Tag Archives: College Football; Texas Aggies

Friday, September 2, 2016 – Snarky Friday – College Football Kickoff Weekend

Friday, September 2, 2016 – Snarky Friday – College Football Kickoff Weekend

The Friday before the first official weekend of college football is usually spent listing who got arrested, suspended and for what and thus will not be playing in this weekend football openers on Saturday. Let’s sum it up by saying to those of you not playing:

“quit being stupid,

stay off of social media,

don’t steal other peoples’ stuff,

stop hitting people and your pets when you get angry,

have a designated driver,

don’t smoke dope and

No (and passed out cold) means NO!”

But enough about Baylor, Auburn, Notre Dame, Texas A&M, Alabama, OU, Stanford, Mississippi State, Ole Miss and USC players.

Tonight we have Baylor vs Northwestern – the Baptist Bears against the Northwestern Demons. @ 6:30. No TV. Not even baptismal streaming on ESPN3. These Demons just might add to the other demons haunting Baylor. Sorry Baylor nieces, nephews and gnieces and gnephews. Wishing for an upset. Go Cousin Daryl – DC for Northwestern.

Speaking of Natchitoches where Northwestern is located, we have the other brother, Nacogdoches, and his town my Alma Mater # 1 Stephen F. Austin playing Texas Tech in Lubbock @ 7:00 on Saturday. No TV. Not even ESPN3 streaming. Listen up, Jacks. Lubbock will look completely foreign and bare. You will recognize it instantly with no trees.  Do not bring your axes. However, beware of flying tortillas as well as flying footballs. Ax ‘Em Jacks!

Ax'Em Jacks!

# 8 Stanford and Kansas State @ 8:00 on FS1. The Wildkats from Kansas State travel to meet west coast Cardinal brainiacs and free thinkers. Think culture clash.

It’s a bloody Mary morning when #3 OU visits #15 The University of Houston @ 11:00 AM on ABC. To select a favorite is like trying to decide between a root canal and a hot water enema. I will go with the best looking red uniforms.

#5 LSU vs Wisconsin @ 2:30 on ABC. Leaping Lambeaux Field! And breathing the air of Vince Lombardi. ESPN Game Day @ 9:00. See which animal head Lee Curses puts on his head predicting the winner. On Wisconsin and into the Eye (and mouth) of the Tiger. Geaux Tigers! And Run Leonard Run!

#16 ucla vs TAMU @ 2:30 on CBS. The Aggies scored SEC Game Day at 9:00. I am getting my maroon, Adidas ensemble ready to tail gate. Thank you Hokes for the invitation!

Note to ucla QB, Josh Rosen: You might want to check out the 50,000 Aggies that will show up to Yell Practice tonight so you can become accustomed to the noise. Then prepare for another 50,000 the next day. This ain’t Utah.

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Alma Mater # 2 Sam Houston State v Oklahoma Panhandle State in beautiful Bowers Stadium in Huntsville, Texas @ 6:00. No TV. Go Bearkats!

#1 Alabama vs # 20 USC @ 7:00 on ABC. Roll Tide and stop with the OJ jokes. But you are correct. None of the other Heismans have killed people. At least not yet.

On Sunday, # 10 Notre Dame vs and the Strong and up and coming Texas Longhorns. Bless me Father for I have sinned and will be pulling for the Longhorns. The leprechaun is creepy; Bevo is not.

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Monday; # 11 Ole Miss and #4 Florida State @ 7:00 on ESPN in Orlando assuming the entire peninsula has not been washed away.

Go Team Fight!

BTHO ucla!

Thursday, September 1, 2016 – Kick Off – We Are Hours Away

Thursday, September 1, 2016 – Kick Off – We Are Hours Away

Even though Charlotte plays Louisville and Appalachian State plays Tennessee this evening, the only game under discussion today is TEXAS A&M and ucla.

Good morning, boys and girls. Saint Madeline Hunter here with our anticipatory set:

You don’t tug on Superman’s cape,

You don’t spit into the wind;

You don’t pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger and

You don’t mess around with Jim or The Twelfth Man.

12th Man

Tour of Kyle Field. November 2015. Check out the maroon shoes.

Our vocabulary word for the day is peradventure. It is a noun meaning chance, doubt or uncertainty.

Your assignment is to use peradventure in a sentence. Your sentence, however, must tell a story with a beginning, middle and end. For example:

Even though UCLA QB Josh Rosen said the crowd noise would not be a factor on Saturday, his inability to demonstrate beyond peradventure of an onward march collapsed under the weight of The Twelfth Man in Kyle Field.

Bruin number 3? Texas Aggie number 15 has your number. I hope you have many Myles before you sleep.

BTHO ucla

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Myles Garrett. Team march in 2015. Photo by me.

Friday, August 5, 2016 – Snarky Friday and the Texas Aggie Ass’t Coaches

Friday, August 5, 2016 – Snarky Friday and the Texas Aggie Ass’t Coaches

When something bad happens with the Aggies, we call it Bad Bull. Nobody exemplified that better than the two Bad Bull Dumbass football coaches for Texas A&M at the Women’s Chalk Talk Clinic this week. As soon as it hit the news that “the presentation slides were too vulgar to be shown on TV,” we all took to our computers and tablets to see what you said. Where did you get your slide presentation, Baylor? Sorry, that was a low blow to The Bears and certainly not very Christian, but the point is your attitudes and college football’s attitudes toward women.

I realize the Aggies plan a throw-back uniform day to honor the 1957 Heisman Trophy Winner, John David Crow, but that does not include the attitudes from the 1950’s.  In fact, I cannot think of a time period when your words would have been acceptable – perhaps cave man era. You would never give a presentation with such vulgar innuendoes if your mother, sister, girlfriend, wife were in the attendance. I hope that they are as ashamed and embarrassed by your behavior as every other woman is. Even I was offended and it usually takes a lot to offend me.

Of course, Mack Brown, you did not help the situation by saying “I never lost a women’s coaching clinic.” This is probably true, but I was at a women’s football clinic, on THE University of Texas campus when Coach Brown turned white as the proverbial sheet when a women stood and asked “Why did you replace Major Applewhite with Chris Simms as QB?”

Please stop it with the underestimating our football intelligence and listen up and listen up GOOD, coaches. You cannot continue to view and treat women as your fantasy blow up dolls by giving presentations with vulgar, sexual, rude, degrading, and chauvinistic language. You must stop continuing to foster this type of climate on college campuses whether it is football or physics club.

Both of the TAMU presenters are Assistant Coaches. That means somebody supervises them. Where were you, Coach Supervisor? And ultimately it is Head Coach Sumlin’s responsibility. Coach Kevin, you really need to get the boys under control. A two-week suspension without pay should be “suspended indefinitely without pay.”   However, as Ron White says “You can’t fix stupid.”

I hope both of the ass’t coaches learn from this experience and stay in “Assistant Coach Hell” indefinitely.

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Tailgating 2015 – Alabama Game. Team march in led by Sumlin. Photo by me.

Thursday, August 4, 2016 – Not the Only One Ready for Football

Thursday, August 4, 2016

I guess I am not the only one ready for some college football. Loved all of the snarky responses yesterday. Here are my responses to your responses:

Stephen F. Austin State – Alma mater to degree # 1. Ax ‘Em Jacks. “Oh future bright, neath the purple and white, all hail to SFA…”

Ax'Em Jacks!

Sam Houston State Bear Kats –Alma mater to degree # 2. All SHSU sports are covered by the TV channels in Bryan – so cool. Teach me some cheers, Telisha.

Northwestern – go DEFENSE! Cousin Darryl (but not my other Cousin Darryl) is Defensive Coordinator. Go Demons! But not against SFA or Sam Houston!

Texas Tech – I shall anxiously await my case of tortillas. Will they be arriving by Fed Ex or a TT EX on a horse? Please know I will throw them at the TV when TT plays OU and those other schools like Kansas and Iowa State that really need to concentrate on basketball.  Go Kliff!

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Alabama – I hope my readership does not fall off either, JH. I was under the impression that the four from Alabama and/or who support the Tide and who actually read HWIT represented the entire literacy of the state. Just to clarify you know I will yell “Roll Tide” when you meet Auburn, South Carolina (or any school coached by Uncle Will “Exploding Head” Muschamp), any school from Florida and any team that Bama plays that will help Texas A&M look better in the SEC West. Also, should Larry Culpepper be hawking Dr. Peppers as Alabama prepares for another National Championship in January, I will put Roll Tide on my banner.

Texas A&M – Alma mater to degree #3. Being an equal opportunity Snark my Aggies get an entire post tomorrow. Some Bad Bull.

Tuesday, May, 10, 2016 – Here’s What I’m Thinking – or Déjà vu all over again.

Tuesday, May, 10, 2016 – Here’s What I’m Thinking – or Déjà vu all over again.

Given that I somehow picked up a cyber bucket load of friends over the weekend I thought I better tell everyone about Here’s What I’m Thinking again. I am already wondering how many have Unfollowed or Unfriended me already.

I write a weblog called Here’s What I’m Thinking (HWIT). The blog then connects to Facebook and other social media sites. The easiest way to read what I am thinking about is to Google Drdrd85.me. It should take you directly to the website.

The purpose is to make at least one person smile/laugh or think every day – Monday through Friday and sometimes on the weekend. Notice: it is not called Here’s What I Believe. Nor it is called Here’s What I think You Should Believe.

During the seasons (college football and college basketball) I write about sports. But it is not your ordinary sports column – mine include critiques of all fashion attire from the press box to the field. “Bent Mushberger? Who dressed you this morning? Please retire and go away.”

Monday is always My Monday after Football Weekend Awards. You can almost bet money that The Ugliest Uniform Award will go to the West Coast and probably from Oregon. Is there NIKE factory just for pukey yellow?

I write about teams I like and teams that play teams that I like. This includes The Fighting Texas Aggies, the LSU Tigers, the rest of the SEC except for Florida and any school from that peninsula. I write about Uncle Will Muschamp at SC or whatever school happens to have hired him. I write about the Baylor Bears, THE University of Texas at Austin and what is left of the Big 12 Conference, the Stephen F. Austin Lumberjacks and Notre Dame or RL and refer to them as the NBC Network Conference.

Sidebar: Alabama. I have nothing to say about the school at the moment. But I know if I do not specifically mention Alabama, the Roll Tide Roll readers will comment.

Somedays I think about politics. Since none of us seem to know what to think about this year’s presidential election, I am a bipartisan snark. For example: Please sign the petition to get Hillary to stop wearing the green brocade jacket. It looks like you made it from the parlor curtains. Or perhaps to Mr. Trump – Sir, if elected will you have your private plane repainted as Air Force One or will you purchase a new one?”

I seem to have a diverse group of readers representing many views and experiences. Please know I respect you and your views. While I may disagree with you on some issues I will defend to the death and Remember the Alamo your right to say it.

Some days I write about the Texas public education system and the educational institution. You think the loss of cursive writing is an issue. See what else is happening to the youth of America.

As the first Native Born Texan in the family, I post many topics about Texas.

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My Proud to be from Texas Wall.

But as my dear Mama used to say “The only thing that separates a Coon Ass from a Jack Ass is the Sabine River.” Some days Louisiana gets the topic de jour. See French. Good, huh?

And of course I write about my family and friends. This is how I get readers. They live in fear of what I am going to say. If I know you or have known you, I WILL write about you at some point in time. You should hope I refer to you with a loving nickname because I like you and only you know who you are. If I don’t like you, I might add all of your personal information including a MapQuest link to your house.

At least 98% of what I post is my original work including photographs. The remaining 2% comes from other postings only if I am impressed or too lazy to post my own work. If I use some one’s photo, I try to give credit to the photographer or from whose collection I borrowed it.

That is a summary of Here’s What I Thinking. Thank you for reading. I hope you find something along the way to make you smile or think about.

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Photo by me.

CC: Hillary Clinton’s email server

Wednesday, May 4, 2016 – Golf, Politics and Football

Wednesday, May 4, 2016 – Golf, Politics and Football

The Briarcrest Women’s Golf Association begins play today in The President’s Cup Tournament. For the next three Wednesday’s we play 18 holes and turn in our two best score cards.

Speaking of score cards… It appears Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump will be the finalists for rest of the campaign circus. I saw where one could get a “Woman Card” from the Hillary campaign. Am I going to need this to go to a public bathroom? Say for example – when I am tailgating at Kyle Field?

Four months from today, Texas Aggies across the world will be reading of the Aggie football team’s victory over UCLA. Football season is three months and 29 days away from kickoff. The 2016 SEC Championship Game is predicted to be between LSU and Tennessee. Tennessee? Rocky Top and the Tigers?

The Texas Aggies have a 100 to 1 chance of winning the National Football Championship. Why are you laughing – THE University of Texas at Austin? They are the same odds you have of raising the National Championship trophy in Austin. Both schools should be crying – those are the same odds of The University of Houston winning the championship.

Me and Tailgating

Tailgating @ Kyle Field – 2015 When Alabama came to town.

Gig’Em! We do have a Knight in shining maroon armor. I hope I have a golf club that shines today. Please let it be the putter.

Monday, February 8, 2016 – WHOOP!

Monday, February 8, 2016 – WHOOP!

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George S. Patton Jr. — ‘Give me an Army of West Point graduates and I’ll win a battle… Give me a handful of Texas Aggies and I’ll win a war.’

The Brazos Valley and Texas A&M University are taking full credit for yesterday’s win by the Denver Broncos. This includes congratulations to Head Coach Gary Kubiak, Class of 83 (I think) and to the first Texas Aggie to be selected as Most Valuable Player in a Super Bowl – Outside linebacker, Von Miller, from DeSoto, Texas. (NOTE: NOT DALLAS!)

Further congratulations go to Peyton Manning and the entire Denver organization – especially the lady with the Botox lips at the trophy presentation. I think she is the owner.

Gig ‘Em Broncos.

Monday, January 4, 2016 – The Last Monday After Saturday Football Awards for this Season

Monday, January 4, 2016 – The Last Monday After Saturday Football Awards for this Season

And then there was one. There is only one more college football game on January 11 between Clemson and Alabama for the National Football Championship. Then it is withdrawal until September, watching ESPN Classic on cable TV, or watching the 2005 National Championship game over and over on The Longhorn Network.

So today is my last college football awards until kickoff next Fall. And the winner is:

The backup to the backup to the backup … Quarterback. To the Jakes, Jarretts, Chrises, the Oregon back-up, all who stepped up when the guy in front of you left for whatever reason and especially to Bram Kolhausan from TCU: All of you win the Ready, Wait and Win Award. TCU – Thank you for a game for the ages. Thank goodness I flipped back to ESPN (who else?) just as the first of three overtimes began.

So if sports and athletics teach you about life, then learn from these back up players.

  • Be ready.
  • Never give up.
  • You are the best at what you do or you would not be where you are. But there is always somebody waiting just behind you who can take your place.
  • Regardless of how good you are, or think you are, you are not indispensable.
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Photo by me – Cooper Landing, Alaska – 2014

Happy Monday. Roll Tide. Bye-Bye Coach Spavital. See if Uncle Will Muschamp needs any help at South Carolina.

December 31, 2015 – That Last Day of 2015 – The Hours are Slip Sliding Away

December 31, 2015 – That Last Day of 2015 – The Hours are Slip Sliding Away

And the sunset slowly sets on another year.

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Photo by me. College Station, Texas 11.10.15

The Aggies were outscored and time ran out in the Music City Bowl. In spite of all the sour notes from Nashville, I am still proud of them as always.

I do have a question and a comment for the A&M coaching staff. I was wondering, like the entire Aggie nation, did you not watch any footage of the quarterback running to his left? I mean, he only ran it at least once in about every series. I actually kinda caught on to it about the third time and I do make enormous incomes as all of you do. And that change of cadence count at the line of scrimmage? Nice job, Louisville. I think that falls into the “Outcoached” file for A&M.

But let’s climb into the press box.

Andre Ware – we know where you attended college. (University of Houston, during the Southwest Conference days) Tom Hart, who are you?

Since both of you so subjectively offered your unwanted opinion on every topic from the broadcast booth, I wanted to share my opinion of both of you. I could wax and wane about your lack of objectivity when you only made positive comments toward The Cardinals. I could opine ad nausea as both of you did offering your personal and unwanted opinions regarding players, coaches, referees, the Fourth of July and the British royal family and the Kardashians having a cook out together that day. OK – I was just making up that last part.

I could go on and on about your commentary. However, let me just sum it up in two words – YOU SUCK! I did not think any two could be worse that Brent Mushburger and Old Florida quarterback, or the two idiots on CBS.

This just in from Aggieland – “I feel my hynie heating up.” Kevin Sumlin.

May the coming year bring peace, health, and happiness to all. Maybe it also bring several quarterbacks and at least a new offensive coordinator to College Station. And ROLL TIDE!

Happy New Year!

Wednesday, December 30, 2-15 – An Attack of Bureaucracy, Bears and Tigers and On My T-Shirt Soapbox

Wednesday, December 30, 2-15 – An Attack of Bureaucracy, Bears and Tigers and On My T-Shirt Soapbox

But first – Who needs a quarterback when you can just run the football? Congratulations to Baylor and their record setting college football bowl game for most rushing yards. Run, Johnny, Run. Speaking of running and rushing, how about that Leonard Fournette? Geaux Tigers!

Texas Tech, the red shoes were working for you. They looked good on TV. Too bad you could not click your red shoes together three times and say “There’s no place like Lubbock.” You still have one of the best looking coaches and next year you will have a defense. Meanwhile, tie that quarterback down. He is a good one.

As I said, I had an attack of bureaucracy the other day when reading a Facebook post and decided to make up some rules to alleviate the attack.

The great, Kris Kristofferson sings the theme song of all bureaucracies “When you waste your time a talking to the people who don’t listen, who do you think’s gonna care?” Nevertheless, like all recovering bureaucrats, I am still going to respond. I told you I had an attack of bureaucracy, but I did not call together a committee or focus group. It is just my brain, as usual.

The individual’s post was the person’s reflection on college student athletes and their inability to articulate during an interview. The individual went on to say “perhaps the athletes should be required to take an English course to learn to speak.” I just happen to know the individual is a T-shirt wearer only and never attended college.

Here’s What I’m Thinking – There is a distinct difference between the individual who only wears the T-shirt of their favorite college or university and one who attended and earned it. We see the sacrifices from the inside not the outside. Unless one actually put in the sacrifices necessary to earn that T-shirt, one has a completely different perspective. This includes spouses’ and parents’ sacrifices so their husbands, wives, children and grandchildren could attend college and earn that T-shirt. An even better proof of sacrifice is the sheepskin with the funny looking letters written on it for the Baccalaurean Degrees (or other designated degrees) Sidebar: when is the last time you used “Baccalaurean” in a sentence? See what going to college can do?

Here are some thing for you to think about, FB Poster, before you criticize a student athlete and their skill sets.

Rule 1 – NEVER criticize the student-athlete. This is a young person who is performing in a classroom setting that just happens to have millions of people watching.

Rule 2 – Do not make judgements based on a single interview of an individual player.

Rule 3 – Be in the moment. Think back to when you were 18-to 21 years old. How articulate were you when a national reporter shoved a microphone in your face? Especially after the adrenaline rush of a football game you have just played. One just might be a paleontology major with a 3.0+ GPA who really does not like to speak in public.

Rule 4 – Ensure you have the correct course of study. Student athletes are required to take public speaking courses. Not English courses. They are not going to write a book or a poem or diagram a sentence. They not only take courses in public speaking, they are required to take seminars in professional dress and professional dining etiquette. This is not to mention job interviewing skills.

Rule 5 – One may criticize and/or critique the coaching staff, the refereeing squad and the so-called “professional” commentators. Most of these people should be criticized, critiqued and even fired for their lack of speaking skills and use of proper grammar and their inability to articulate. They are paid to be “professional.” The student athlete is not. He or she is just trying to do what they love and be the best at it.

I am so glad FB Poster loves college football and supports their team, but please think about this – the players may be 10 feet tall, weigh 400 pounds, or can out run the wind, but inside they are still kids.

Now, I am going to put on my T-Shirt for tonight’s Music City Bowl. Gig ‘Em, Aggies!

BTHO Louisville

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Myles Garrett – Paleontology Major at Texas A&M with 3.0+ GPA. Oh yes, he is a pretty good defensive end too.

Sully's Boots

Coins for good luck at Sully’s Boots.