Category Archives: Politics

Wednesday, June 21, 2017 –Estival Solstice and a New Ken

Wednesday, June 21, 2017 –Estival Solstice and a New Ken

Our new word for the day is “Estival.” It is an adjective that means pertaining or appropriate to summer. Today marks the summer solstice or the estival solstice. It is the longest day of the year with the longest twilight. I wonder if that translates to the longest happy hour.

Texas Stonehenge – Kerrville, Texas Photo by me

If you want to learn more about the summer solstice, pretend you are in Mr. Michael’s 9th Grade physical science class and click on the link. There are some pretty cool illustrations. To my Alaska friends, get out the sleep masks; there is going to be a lot of sunlight.

https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2017/6/19/15832952/summer-solstice-2017

Since this is a long day, let us catch up on what I have been thinking.

Please sign the online petition to never allow Texas A&M to play TCU in baseball.

Tropical storm Cindy is about the make landfall through New Orleans and the southern states bringing inches plus of rain. It would be nice if there was a FEMA Director. Doesn’t FEMA stand for Federal EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT? Just in case the low lying areas need help or have an emergency.

Congratulations to Diana Taurasi for becoming the all-time leading scorer in professional women’s basketball. Thank you Title IX and believers in women’s athletics. Thank you, Diana.

The 2017 Texas A&M Maroon out game is with Auburn on Saturday, November Fourth. I was hoping the Maroon Out game would be with Alabama, but I will take Auburn. It is always fun to do Snarky Fridays when the Aggies play a school named after a hair color. And perhaps the Aggies can count on a modicum of support from The Tide.

Did you know there is new Ken doll? Mattel updated Barbie’s long-time, gay boyfriend, Ken, to create a diversity look. There are actually 15 new Kens. They have different skin colors, different body types and different hair styles and colors. Body types include slim, original and large. Various hair styles even include the man bun.

I have not researched the various Ken dolls, but I hope there is Cut-n-Shoot/Porter Ken. This Ken would wear jeans, boots, a torn T-shirt, and a Make America Great Again cap. Of course he would drive a pick-up truck; would be overweight, have a beer belly and sport a mullet. He would come with diabetes prescription, a six-pack of Miller Lite, a pack of Marlboros and a worn EZ-Boy Recliner. Remote control, trailer and pit bulls not included.

As I said I have not researched the various Kens, but here’s what I’m thinking. These Kens, like those who preceded him, are genitalia challenged or sans male body parts. Perhaps Barbie likes him that way.

It is going to be a long day. Enjoy the estival solstice.

Friday, June 16, 2017 – Snarky Friday and A Stream of Consciousness

Friday, June 16, 2017 – Snarky Friday and A Stream of Consciousness

What a world! As my dear, departed and very wise Mother used to say about politics and other sordid activities: “Play in shit, you gonna get shitty.”

Today I shall just have a stream of consciousness regarding this week’s activities as they relate to the increase in fecal material hitting the rotating blades of the oscillating fan surrounding The Potomac and outlying areas. For a little extra, you might try listening to some appropriate music while trying to read. I am listening to Joan Baez – “Ain’t Gonna Let Nobody Turn Me Around. Keep on a walking; Keep on a talking, gonna built a brand new world…”

Ready? Read.

What happened? Be careful what you wish for or in this case who you vote for. Only 145days? Crooked Hillary did it. Tweet. Tweet. Tweet. I am not under investigation. I am not a crook. I did not have sex with that woman. Resignation. Impeachment. And now POTUS you are under investigation. You’re lying. He’s lying. She’s lying. Lock her up. GOP. Resist. James Comey. “You’re Fired” only works in business on TV. Putin. Putin. Root and Tootin! FBI. Department of Justice. Tweet some more. GOLF. Lawyers, lawyers, filling Washington, D. C. I should have gone to law school. Russians. Russians. Let’s Make a Deal. Michael Flynn. More lawyers. Democrats. Jared. Ivanka. Donald Jr. A New Jersey Lawyer? Money laundering? I miss The Sopranos. Bada Bing. Constitutional Crisis. Really good chocolate cake and we the US just bombed the crap out of Syria. Are there any US Allies in the World left? This is gonna take a long time to clean up all this shit and those playing in it get shittier. Meanwhile, CAN WE PLEASE STOP SHOOTING EACH OTHER AND SIT DOWN AND TALK FOR THE GOOD OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA?

Happy Friday.

Wednesday, June 14, 2017 – FLAG DAY. Stand Up and Sing Along and Celebrate the Freedom

Wednesday, June 14, 2017 – FLAG DAY. Stand Up, Sing Along and Celebrate the Freedom

You’re a Grand Old Flag and Forever in Peace Shall You Wave…

You’re a Grand Old Flag was written by George M. Cohen.

Bet you did not know this. You’re a Grand Old Flag is the fight song of Oak Ridge North High School in Conroe, Texas.

Tuesday, June 13, 2017 – The Pentagon Papers – Leaking and Lying in Modern Times

Tuesday, June 13, 2017 – The Pentagon Papers – Leaking and Lying in Modern Times

Time for your daily history lesson, Boys and Girls.

On this day in history the New York Times began publishing The Pentagon Papers by Daniel Ellsberg. The Pentagon Papers were officially titled United States – Vietnam Relations, 1945–1967: A Study Prepared by the Department of Defense. The year? 1971.

Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara created the Vietnam Study Task Force on June 17, 1967, for the purpose of writing an “encyclopedic history of the Vietnam War“. McNamara claimed that he wanted to leave a written record for historians, to prevent policy errors in future administrations. McNamara neglected to inform either President Lyndon Johnson or Secretary of State Dean Rusk about the study.”

The huge volumes of sensitive, secret, sort of secret, and real secret information about the US government was revealed to the public. Notice the appropriate word is “revealed” and not “leaked.”

For example, it revealed that presidential administrations had been and were systematically lying and/or secretly keeping activities from the media. Even more damaging, the papers revealed that the US military had secretly engaged in expanding the scope of the Vietnam Conflict.

Ellsberg was charged with conspiracy, espionage and theft of government documents. (Aka leak of such documents) Then came newly elected in 1968 Richard Nixon. The charges against Ellsberg were later dropped when Tricky Dick tried to restrain the press. Tricky Dick then ordered White House officials to dress like plumbers and to use unlawful and unethical efforts to discredit Ellsberg.

Fast forward to the end – the publication of The Pentagon Papers kicked off a new phase in politics with secret, covert and illegal (aka leaking and lying) actions by the Executive Office and all for public consumption on the social media of the day – print, radio and TV.

There were break-ins and burglaries at The Watergate Hotel and the US became embroiled in the largest constitutional crisis to date. And there were tapes of meetings with The POTUS. It all came crashing down like a House of Cards. The POTUS resigned before impeachment charges could be brought. The plumbers and lots of others went to prison. “I am not a crook” turned out to be one.

And that brings us to the present and the irony of history repeating itself. Here’s what I’m thinking. When revealed to the public The Pentagon Papers were over 1000 printed pages. Trumpet’s Twitter rants are going to be much shorter in length, but perhaps the results will be the same.

Class dismissed.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pentagon_Papers

Monday, June 12, 2017 – Make-up Monday. Beer, Bubbles, Bats and Aggies

Monday, June 12, 2017 – Make-up Monday. Beer, Bubbles, Bats and Aggies

I know I have been a slacker for a couple of days and did not post my profound and often profane thoughts for the merriment and amusement of all 48 people who might read Here’s What I’m Thinking.

So to make up here’s what I thought starting with Friday, June 9:

I thought I had enough beer for the first Regional game between Texas A&M and Davidson. But noooo, I had to drink almost all of it because it took 17 innings for the Aggies to finally get the winning run.

Saturday, June 10 – Fortunately there was enough beer left for the Aggies to defeat Davidson in the second Regional game that send the Aggies to the College World Series (CWS). Here’s to Davidson players who gave every pitch, catch, throw, hit and play their ultimate talent. Your fans were great and we hope you enjoyed Aggieland. (Except for the score parts).

To the ESPN2 Announcers: Yes, the campus of Texas A&M University is very big. Even you, Jay Walker were impressed. FYI, Jay, there is NO 10th Man! WE ARE THE 12TH Man in all sports. Next time learn more about the school you are covering. Also, the bubbles burst, so they are not a distraction to the batter!

After game I went to a bookstore and bought It Can’t Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis. It was first published in October 1935. Descriptor from the book jacket: … a political satire with the chilling realistic rise of a president who becomes a dictator to save the nation from welfare cheats, sex, crime and a liberal press.” I am into reading scary horror books. I just finished 1984 and The Handmaiden’s Tale.

Sunday, June 11 – Watched LPGA and vowed never to wear an outfit like this. I do not care if she is one of the best golfers in world.

While reading scary book I got this picture from Niece # 1.

That is Sister # 1 (wait I only have one sister) in front of a giant Louisville Slugger. It’s a baseball bat for the uninformed and sports challenged. Sister, Niece#1 and Gniece #1 are touring the sights and sounds of Gniece # 1’s home of Louisville.

Speaking of Louisville and bats, I do hope my sister is placing a curse on the baseball bats of the Louisville Cardinals – the upcoming opponent of Texas A&M. Gig ‘Em Aggies.

BTHO Louisville! WHOOP!

Friday, June 3, 2017 – Yesterday

Friday, June 3 – Yesterday

Yesterday the internet was down. That probably accounts for the five provider trucks in my hood all day. So here is yesterday’s HWIT.

Friday, June 2, 2017 – The Great Tom Leher

Listening to Tom Leher this morning. I thought the songs were about social and political issues and happening in the 1950’s and 1960’s. I did not realize it was a dystopian futuristic view of The United States in 2017. Thank you Donald Dumbster. I’m going with Paris Agreement.

Wednesday, May 31, 2017 – “Despite the constant negative press covfefe”

Wednesday, May 31, 2017 – “Despite the constant negative press covfefe”

Good morning, boys and girls,

Our new word for the day is: Covfefe. It appears to be a new word for the world made up by the Tweeter in Chief. Currently there seems to be no exact definition or translation or history of usage on this planet. However, Fake News, Inc. reports it is possible this is the translation from the Russian term “covfefenski” which means “highly disliked reporters and people smarter than me.” (sic)

Other unknown and unidentified and made up sources think the word is proof the alien Pod People from the Planet Denial were successful when they said “Take me to your leader.”

Other more credible sources, including but not limited to the FBI believe the word “covfefe” means “The Truth is Out There.” This slogan worked well for the agency when files were known as the X-Files.

Like most of the world we really do not know what President Twitter meant in his morning twitter rant. But since he is giving his cell number to everyone, I will try to contact him later. I hope he does not have one of those burner phones.

Meanwhile, how about a nice tune for Ivanka and Jared today? Here’s Call Me, by Blondie. Such fun lyrics. Roll me in designer sheets too. And call me for your lover’s alibi.  I think the lyrics are now available in Chinese.

 

May 30, 2017 – Turn Out the Lights; the Party’s Over!

May 30, 2017 – Turn Out the Lights; the Party’s Over!

“Turn out the lights; the party’s over;

They say that all good things must end;

Turn out the lights: the party’s over;

And tomorrow starts the same old thing again.”

I doubt that the wonderful country singer Ray Price was talking about the government. Yesterday was sine die for the 85th Texas Legislature. The day of adjournment until called again. Or until Governor Abbott checks his vacation calendar.

So how did the 85th Legislature end? In protest of SB 4 – Immigration. There was the 3 AM singing at the Governor’s Mansion protests. A Republican House member called Immigrations and Customs Enforcement (ICE) to remove protestors in the capitol. Note: these protesters in red should not be confused with the women dressed in red as in The Hand Maiden’s Tale.  These were in The Senate Gallery. These and others were protesting almost every piece of legislation. In fact, it is difficult to know your protestors in Austin without a program.

Then there was the floor shoving match in the House of Representatives which resulted in a threatening language to a colleague with words like “gun” and “bullet” and “your head” in the same sentence. This was followed by the Governor signing new gun legislation. Do not go ballistic; I happen to like guns. Just saying PR people need to do better at press releasing timing.

And that is just the tip of the dome. According to The Houston Chronicle, it will cost about $800,000 for one special session. But it will be so worth it for Dan, The Evangelical to lead the Bathroom Brigade of Buffoonery into Texas Public Schools. Because there is one thing every Texas school child needs to know and that is where to go to the bathroom. Biology textbooks will soon show diagrams that show is it is not just “the outside” junk that counts in gender, but also “the inside junk.” We all know the only places that transgender people hang out are public schools.Designating a special place to urinate in schools should be the highest priority of the Texas legislature.

Here’s what I’m thinking. When Dan the Evangelical gets his way and the idiots are called to leave their villages, the Texas bathroom bill will pass. Therefore every bathroom that is designated “The Different One” should have a poster size photo of Dan, the Evangelical falling on his sword.

Keep your voter registration card current.

Monday, May 29, 2017 – Memorial Day OKC TAMU WCWS and Sine Die, but Hold Your Bladders!

Monday, May 29, 2017 – Memorial Day OKC TAMU WCWS and Sine Die, but Hold Your Bladders!

Today let us pause at 3:00 PM local time for a moment of silence for all who sacrificed for our freedom to pursue life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. You are not forgotten.

Thank you vets that my pursuit of happiness is headed toward Oklahoma City (OKC) to see the Fighting Texas Aggie (TAMU) softball team win the Women’s College World Series (WCWS). No, I am not going. There are certain advantages to attending. For example,

  1. being part of the excitement,
  2. participating in the Fan Fest activities,
  3. purchasing a T-shirt
  4. seeing your team win or
  5. supporting your team in a loss.

Of course there are advantages to staying home. For example, (in order they come to mind)

  1. beer,
  2. wine,
  3. beer with no waiting line,
  4. wine with no waiting line,
  5. instant replay,
  6. able to scream obscenities at umpires and coaches and not be expelled from your home,
  7. able to pause game
  8. a clean bathroom or at least you know who’s dirt it is
  9. wine,
  10. beer,
  11. wearing an Aggie T-shirt you found on the floor that morning,
  12. wearing the T-shirt you slept in,
  13. wearing the shorts you had on yesterday,
  14. not wearing foundation garments,
  15. not sitting on the front row behind home plate exposing my fish belly white legs and giving the camera a view I do not want to expose on national TV, especially not wearing foundation garments,
  16. no need for sunscreen,
  17. beer,
  18. wine,
  19. two equal opportunity, available to all who have the urge to go bathrooms. Note: My RP retirement document is of special interest in the guest bathroom, but best of all,
  20. Being a part of the 12th Man and watching the Aggies win the WCWS, able to dance throughout the house and sing War Hymn.

The WCSW begins in Oklahoma City on Thursday, June 1 on ESPN. FYI – These ain’t your church softball games. Watch some incredible athletes.  Bet you haven’t seen girls throw like this before!

 

But wait, the lusty month of May is not yet over – especially for public schools. There are still more buses the public institution can be thrown under.

Today is Sine Die or the last day of the Texas Legislature.

But hold your bladders. We, Texans, still do not know where to go to the bathroom. So Dan, The Evangelical, is calling for a Special Legislative Session. Of course, he is blaming it on the Speaker of the House, Cajones Straus because Speaker Straus will not play with stupid legislation or those who support it. This of course is the Abbott and Castello Show of Texas. Could we just sine die both of you without assigning a day for a further meeting or hearing?

Am I the only one who finds irony in tax payers’ dollars funding a special legislative session regarding property taxes and where to potty places in public schools?

Thursday, May 25, 2017 – Goodness. Gracious. Great Balls of Fire!

Thursday, May 25, 2017 – Goodness. Gracious. Great Balls of Fire!

I found this item on Twitter this morning from the Austin American Statesman. I want to ensure my friend, Howard sees it. Howard, if you do not have a Loud Mouth Billy Bass fish for your roosters, let me know and I will get you one, deliver it to you and take pictures of the roosters’ responses. And that is only the first part of the story below.

I also want to ensure my friend, Joan Allen sees this item. Joan, I wonder if there is a demonstration of an oral castration of hogs. Is this Castell Festival sponsored by R. Perky?

Christmas is six months from today. Just so you know… I do not want to find tickets to the testival in my stocking.

Anyway, click on the link for a good Thursday laugh. Thought for the day: Don’t order the cow fries or mountain oysters.

Austin Statesman (@statesman) tweeted at 9:30 AM on Thu, May 25, 2017:

The Castell Testicle Festival was last weekend: Nuts, we missed it … https://t.co/kMT8ZQuvqb https://t.co/uU7Aiv4UsV

(https://twitter.com/statesman/status/867749674337398784?s=09)