Category Archives: Misc.

Friday, June 22, 2018 – Baseball, Omaha and Snarky Friday!

Friday, June 22, 2018 – Baseball, Omaha and Snarky Friday!

To the Big 12 (which are really only 10 schools) Conference and the Other Conferences:

SEC! It just means more!

Let’s Go Mississippi State Bulldogs!

Reveille sends her love to Bully!

Monday, June 11, 2018 – Peace in Our Time

Monday, June 11, 2018 – Peace in Our Time

For historians only:

“Good job, well done, Neville Chamberlain;

Diplomacy wins again;” 1939

“Good job, well done, Dennis Rodman

Diplomacy wins again.” 2018

ttps://youtu.be/OI_OSQ9BDkk

Friday, June 8, 2018 – Snarky Friday and Check for Understanding

Friday, June 8, 2018 – Snarky Friday and Check for Understanding

I know Snarky Friday is usually reserved for me commenting on Saturday college football, but today I’m going to snark on Betsy DeVos – also known as Betsy Devoucher, the Secretary of Education.

Dear Betsy,

Since you have no education credentials or public school background, may I suggest you Google Madeline Hunter, Patron Saint of Instructional Delivery Methods?

As one tries to educate the unwashed masses, Dr. Hunter (note she is a Doctor of Education, like I am) notes that it is imperative to check for understanding. This means check to see if those you are trying to instruct understand the concept you are teaching.

Therefore, I am checking for understanding on this School Safety Commission you are leading. I currently understand that the group will not study guns in schools. You were quoted as saying “you were studying school safety issues, but guns were not part of the study.”

As of May 25, there have been 21 school shootings since January of this year. What are you and your commission studying about schools safety? Food fights in the cafeteria? Water balloons on the playground?

Here’s what I’m thinking. Mrs. DeVos, as always you are way off target on the entire educational process, but you shot yourself in the foot with this one.

Friday, May 25, 2018 – Friday Musings

I am so glad I took that CPR and stop the bleeding class. (See yesterday) Unfortunately, one cannot administer self CPR. I needed to do so last evening with the Texas Aggies baseball team and the Houston Rockets. Both games were thrillers, but the Ags and Rockets pulled out victories. The Rockets’ victory may have been a pyrrhic one. Chris Paul grabbing his hamstring was not good.

Also, in the unfortunate world of sports, I was not able to stop the bleeding the Texas Aggie softball game against Florida.

The Aggies led 4-2 going into the Florida bottom of the ninth and WALK IN the winning run. I would rather lose by the run rule. Oh well, new day, new opportunity.

There may not be much SEC baseball or Super Regional Softball in the Alabama or Florida this weekend. There is a 90% chance a tropical storm this weekend.

In other news you don’t care about, I bought a new bed and mattress. It has an adjustable base. That means one can raise the head and/or the feet. Doesn’t adjustable base sound better than “oh, like a hospital bed” as my family described it.

It also features head/neck, lumbar and leg massage – not like that cheap motel massaging bed that used to cost a quarter. The bed comes with a remote control and is wireless. I love it and it truly has made a difference in a restful sleep. However, here is an issue.

The other night I am blissfully asleep when Peach the cat jumps into the bed and hits the remote. The bed starts vibrating and I don’t know if Texas is having a fracking earthquake or I am about to be swallowed into a sink hole. I wake and of course cannot find the damn remote. Meanwhile the cat is asleep at the end of the bed enjoying a massage.

Of course, it is Memorial Day weekend. Please remember the sacrifice of those who served and especially those who gave the greatest sacrifice.

BTHO FLORIDA! And BTHO TBD. However, I am afraid there may be a Tiger waiting. A Tiger with purple and gold stripes.

Friday, May 11, 2018 – Pomp and Circumstance and My Graduation Speech

Friday, May 11, 2018 – Pomp and Circumstance and My Graduation Speech

Thank you, President of My Pretend University. It is an honor and pleasure to speak to you today. Besides, I come from a family who enjoys wearing a cap and gown and listening to boring speakers providing platitudes of promise and hope. I was hoping to get to wear a big necklace or carry banner or something, but it is ok.

Graduates, this is my message to you this May of 2018.

Enjoy the song now because this is probably the last pomp you will get because the circumstances of life kick in as soon as you take off that cap and gown. Sidebar: It is actually called Academic Dress and the head dress is often called a Mortar Board. The bunch of strings on the side is called the tassels and the side on which the tassels hang is dependent on your degree. Advanced degrees usually have tassels on the left and then move to the right side while the opposite is true for undergraduates.

I graduated from college in 1971. There was a crooked, cray cray man in the White House as president. The country was involved in an unpopular war in Vietnam. The Middle East was about to blow up the world. The people were divided over the war and most everything else. People were mean and beat up and killed other people because they did not like people with a different skin color, gender, or thought processes.

I graduated again in 1978 and again in 1985. The world did not get better; however my gown and headdress did get more academic.

Here are my top ten things you need to know as you enter the world.

First. Get real. The world is not a pretty place. Your world is as bad as mine was, but you get to see yours take place live through social media on a 27/7 basis.

As you enter life, at some point, as the country western song says, you will be “lied to, cheated on and treated like dirt.” Therefore, I say to you “Buck up, Sissy Pants!” (Beverly Holfstedder, TBBT.)

Second. In addition, there will be “Good times and riches and sons of a bitches, and you’ll see more than you can recall.” Change your latitude and attitude often. Go to Margaritaville often, but always have a designated driver. (Jimmy Buffet)

Third. Remember, you and your parental units spent big bucks for you to be sitting there. The reason the thing on your head is called a mortar board is because it is fashioned after the flat thing brick layers use to scrap the goo (mortar) that holds brick and stone together. Therefore the one with the strings on the side is to hold your brain together. Don’t blow it by being and doing stupid. Do not aspire to win a Darwin Award. Stupid is as stupid does says Forrest Gump.

Fourth. Learn to spell the word RECEIVE. Do not spell it RECIEVE.

Fifth. Save your tassels. One never knows when life will hit you and you need to make money dancing. Otherwise, just dance. Learn to lead and follow. You get more dance partners that way and dance more often. Also, when your name is called and you feel like dancing when that sheepskin is in your hands, do not let anyone toss you off the stage of graduation or the stage of life when it is your moment.

Sixth. Own a dog and/or cat and be a responsible pet parent.

Seventh. Know that one day you will wake up to sagging boobs, beer bellies, enlarged prostates, swollen joints, peeing in your pants, and forgetting a lot of stuff. Yes, when I was your age I said it was not going to happen to me either.

Eighth. Vote. It does make a difference.

Ninth. Give back and pay it forward.

Tenth. Enjoy YOUR life. It is the only one you have. Be yourself and be comfortable with the person you are. Make your voice heard. Stand up for what you believe in and go make the world a better place.

A toast to all graduates.

Thank you and good luck. Where do I pick up my check? And you said there were refreshments?

 

Monday, April 30, 2018 – Goat Yoga Needs Love Too

Monday, April 30, 2018 – Goat Yoga Needs Love Too

Music for goat yoga – … Goat yoga needs love too and it’s up against the wall redneck yoga; yoga we have learned to love so well…

I know I have written about goat yoga before. It is a yoga done where a small goat stands on your back or other body part. Now it has arrived in the Brazos Valley.  At least for one day, goat yoga was at Blackwater Draw Brewing Company. Yoga at a bar is good. Yoga with a goat in a bar is not so good.

Here are some quotes from Rachel Henson Goat Yoga owner from Houston.

  1. The classes are about an hour and include 15 minutes for getting to know your goat.
  2. Who doesn’t like to just hold a five pound baby goat that’s just super cute?
  3. Any time your backside or your stomach is open toward the goats they’re going to jump on you.

Here’s what I’m thinking.

  1. What is the protocol for getting to know your goat?
    1. Me: “Hello, Goat.”
    2. Goat: “Hi, I’m Billy and I will be your goat in yoga today? What muscles do you want me to put my goat feet on?
  2. At least when you hold kettle balls and weights they will not tinkle on you or leave goat fibers on your spandex yoga suit. You do not have to feed or clean up after the kettle balls or weights either.
  3. I have a cat that jumps on my backside and/or my stomach so I do not need a goat. Of course the cat usually jumps on my backside at 3:00 AM to wake me up and let me know she is going to sleep in the bed with me. She wakes me up again at 3:30 to let me know she is not going to sleep in the bed.

I am not sure when the Goat Yoga Lady will be back in the BV I am certain I will be out of town that day. However, if find you Zen with a goat in goat yoga, then buy your own goat and be happy. As for me, I’ll stay with the cat.

And KB, if you are reading this, Just say NO to Goats!

Original goat yoga article on KAGS news.

 

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Cheer, cheer for old Notre Dame,
Wake up the echoes cheering her name,
Send a volley cheer on high,
Shake down the thunder from the sky.
What though the odds be great or small
Old Notre Dame will win over all,
While her loyal sons are marching
Onward to victory.

If you missed the final seconds of the women’s Division I National basketball championship yesterday, it is worth a google to see the last seconds, even if you do not like basketball. ND is going to need a mural with Three point Jesus to compliment Touchdown Jesus.

At least it wasn’t UConn. Congratulations to Muffett McGraw and Notre Dame and congratulations of Vic Sheafer and the Mississippi State Bulldogs. Congratulations to all of the teams for giving fans one of the most exciting women’s brackets of basketball in years. It was literally a record setting (and breath taking) Final Four preceded by games played by outstanding young women displaying superb athletic skills.

Tonight the men’s Division I National Championship in basketball will be decided between Michigan and Villanova to close out the 2018 basketball season.

Here’s what I’m thinking. Watch out for the Catholics again. And how many days until football season begins?

 

Wednesday March 28, 2018 – A Peach Takeover

Wednesday March 28, 2018 – A Peach Takeover

Peach here. Dr. Biped is napping during the rain. I just woke up to do the input and output thing. Saw the camera and I decided to take a selfie.

I hope you like it. Love Peach.

Now back to my nap. Let me wake up Dr. Biped to let her know I’m back and ready to nap.

Monday, March 26, 2018 – March for Our Lives – When Did You Lose It?

Monday, March 26, 2018 – March for Our Lives – When Did You Lose It?

Saturday, March 24, hundreds of thousands of people took to the streets across the world to make their voices heard regarding gun control. In the history of revolutions this is referred to as “when the barricades go up.”

When did you lose it and begin to cry on Saturday ? You know you did.

Was it when you saw the huge numbers of marchers worldwide?

Was it when you saw Emma Gonzalez stand for six minutes and twenty seconds in silence? Six minutes and twenty seconds is the amount of time it took for one mentally ill person to change the lives of millions. Sit for that amount of time and imagine what the sounds they heard.

For me it was during the reading of names. It began like this:

We are not here today to take away guns. We only want common sense legislation regarding them.

Today, we remember every person who lost their lives in school shootings. We call the names and ages of those who lost their lives at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida and The Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting in Newtown, Connecticut.

My throat tightened as the seventeen names and ages of promising individuals were read from Stoneman Douglas High School were read. Their futures were just beginning.

Here is where I lost it. The names from Sandy Hook and the ages were repeated again and again: “Age six; age six; age six, age seven, age seven, age six… Twenty little children who never got a future. Six educators who will never make a difference in the lives of children.

Then we prayed.

Because of these and all the others we must carry on to create safe learning places for all.

 

Friday, March 23, 2018 – Weekend Events

Friday, March 23, 2018 – Weekend Events

I know. I was absent for two days. My bad.

The clock ran out on the Texas Aggie men’s team last night. It rained three pointers for Michigan all night long. Still proud of you Ags! But as usual, it is the women who will have to take control and BTHO Notre Dame.

What an exciting weekend we have awaiting us. It is the Sweet Sixteen for the women’s basketball teams. Still in are: Texas A&M, Baylor and THE University of Texas. Baylor plays Oregon State at 6 and The UT plays UCLA 8:00 tonight.

The Aggie women play ND tomorrow at 3:00 on ESPN. Dear God, about that stomach virus for the Irish, tonight would be a good time for it to sweep through the team. PS – Sister Jean loves the Aggies!

Because of the late game and because it is The Big Event in BCS, the March for Lives on campus does not begin until 5:00. Therefore Ms. Navasota and I will move our March for Our Lives protest to the courthouse square in Brenham. This time slot fits better for our food and drink schedule.

I am wondering what to write on my sign. Suggestions are most welcome. I still my flag shirt from 1969.

So HWIT – “I wore this shirt in 1969. I did NOT plan to wear it when I was 69 years old and having to do this crap again.”Marching on to other weekend events. Sunday is Palm Sunday marking the beginning Holy Week for Christians. With so many TV offerings, I hope the 60 Minutes Interview with the President El Dick Tator’s porn star mistress does not interfere evening church services or with Charlton Heston (former NRA President) and The Ten Commandments.

Happy Week End.

Praise the Lord and Pass the damn basketball!

BTHO ND!