Thursday, May 24, 2018 – 10 Minutes of Training I Hope I Never Have to Use

Thursday, May 24, 2018 – 10 Minutes of Training I Hope I Never Have to Use

A big thank you to the College Station Fire Stations for offering a ten minute training that could save a person’s life.

Today they offered a “down and dirty” CPR lesson and a “stop the bleeding” lesson.

Here is Annie.

I am CPR certified and felt very comfortable doing the chest compression and applying the defibulator. I like to scream CLEAR. She looks a little pale but you should have seen her before I administered CPR.

The second half of the training was stop the bleeding. I learned how to apply a tourniquet to arms, legs and even the neck area.

There is a special wrap found in stop the bleeding kits that applies pressure to an abdominal or chest wound.

I also learned how to pack a wound. While every one called it a wound, we all know we are talking about a gunshot wound. You have to imagine blood spurting from the wound.

You can find out more and obtain stop the stop the bleeding supplies from the Red Cross and from this website.

I hope I never have to use any of the supplies or administer CPR. I hope you know to administer CPR and know how to stop the bleeding.

Monday, May 21, 2018 – What the Ruck?

Monday, May 21, 2018 – What the Ruck?

I am thinking of attending a ruck this Saturday on the Texas A&M Campus. This thought occurred after I looked up “what is a ruck?”

A ruck is a noun defined as “A tightly packed crowd of people.” It is the foundation of Special Forces training. Rucking requires strength, endurance and character – and it builds it too.

The ruck on Saturday is a 3 to 5 K ruck. Participants carry their rucksack (aka backpack) with everything they need to endure the ruck. The ruck will travel through the campus of Texas A&M with stops and stories along the way regarding the veterans who gave the greatest sacrifice.

Let me think about this. Which words in the definition do not scare me? Those are “A” and “of.” Tightly, packed, crowd and people give me pause.

At the very least, here is what I would need to have in my rucksack to endure the ruck:

  • An EMT
  • An oxygen tank
  • 2 or more liters of water
  • A M*A*S*H unit standing by

Nevertheless, I may give this idea of a ruck some serious thought. If another person went with me, would we be a ruckus? Maybe I will do the Will Rogers thing and watch and wave the flag as the heroes go by.

RIP Billy Cannon

Sunday, May 20, 2018 – RIP Billy Cannon

Please tell cousin Donnie and sister Dale hello.


Friday, May 18, 2018 – Sadness

Friday, May 18, 2018 – Sadness

It is another sad day where innocent people left their homes this morning and will not return for dinner with their families. Join Texas in mourning another school shooting.


All we are asking for is common sense to guns. While thoughts and prayers are sent, remember only legislation can actually stop bullets.

Thursday, May 17, 2018 – I Don’t Know! The Volcano Song

Thursday, May 17, 2018 – I Don’t Know! The Volcano Song

I don’t know. I don’t know.

I don’t know where I’m a gonna go

When the volcano blow. (Jimmy Buffet)

A beautiful sunset from Veterans Park in College Station. Photo by me.

The volcano just blew and the residents on Hawaii are wondering the same. The Kilauea volcano on Hawaii is a spectacular site of Mother Nature. And she looks pretty pissed at the moment. Remember that commercial “It’s not nice to fool Mother Nature”?

I must stop now and get my clothes ready for the Royal Wedding. So far I have separated the whites and the colors. I plan to wear my pajamas, the ones with the little tiaras on them. In fact, I will still be in my tiny tiara pajamas asleep as the royal nuptials are said. I can watch the tele as it is broadcast from across The Pond.

I hope they were not planning to honeymoon in Hawaii.

Monday, May 14, 2018 – Your Thesis Defense Is Too Short

Monday, May 14, 2018 – Your Thesis Defense Is Too Short

I hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day. I only received text greetings from the former meth head that cleans my house once a month. It was group text of about 20. So that left 19 people with phone numbers I did not know. I am thinking of a will change.

But there is no such day for Aunts so moving on. Did you see where the student at Cornell defended her Master’s thesis in her underwear? It seems that during her practice presentation her female professor told her that “her shorts were too short.” So in protest at her actual defense she took off her clothes and did her presentation in her underwear AND videoed it and broadcast it live on Facebook.

Here’s what I’m thinking. You lost me at shorts of any length. Why were you even wearing shorts for a presentation? Unless, you are a sports, athletic, kinesiology major, you do not wear shorts to professionally present to your professors. (I know I split my infinitive.) Even then shorts would be pretty dicey.

I had to borrow clothes to defend my dissertation, but I still wore professional dress. Thank you, Ann C.

I am also thinking what Frank Clark (RIP) and Jon Denton’s faces would have looked like in 1985 if I took off my borrowed clothes and defended in my bra and panties. I know that these two served as chairs of many of my friend’s committees so you can imagine also. I will laugh the rest of the day thinking about this.

Finally, to the student. Is this really the sword of protest you want to fall on? (Correct syntax: “on which you want to fall”). Cornell University will have to add a paragraph to the graduate catalog that reads “All thesis and dissertation defense presentations must be done in clothes that are not considered underwear. In addition shorts of any length may not be worn during the practice or the real deal.”

This is short enough for today. I am wearing appropriate length shorts, but do not have to defend anything today except a golf swing.

I do not know if the girl passed her thesis defense or not.

From the George H. W. Bush Museum and Library

Friday, May 11, 2018 – Pomp and Circumstance and My Graduation Speech

Friday, May 11, 2018 – Pomp and Circumstance and My Graduation Speech

Thank you, President of My Pretend University. It is an honor and pleasure to speak to you today. Besides, I come from a family who enjoys wearing a cap and gown and listening to boring speakers providing platitudes of promise and hope. I was hoping to get to wear a big necklace or carry banner or something, but it is ok.

Graduates, this is my message to you this May of 2018.

Enjoy the song now because this is probably the last pomp you will get because the circumstances of life kick in as soon as you take off that cap and gown. Sidebar: It is actually called Academic Dress and the head dress is often called a Mortar Board. The bunch of strings on the side is called the tassels and the side on which the tassels hang is dependent on your degree. Advanced degrees usually have tassels on the left and then move to the right side while the opposite is true for undergraduates.

I graduated from college in 1971. There was a crooked, cray cray man in the White House as president. The country was involved in an unpopular war in Vietnam. The Middle East was about to blow up the world. The people were divided over the war and most everything else. People were mean and beat up and killed other people because they did not like people with a different skin color, gender, or thought processes.

I graduated again in 1978 and again in 1985. The world did not get better; however my gown and headdress did get more academic.

Here are my top ten things you need to know as you enter the world.

First. Get real. The world is not a pretty place. Your world is as bad as mine was, but you get to see yours take place live through social media on a 27/7 basis.

As you enter life, at some point, as the country western song says, you will be “lied to, cheated on and treated like dirt.” Therefore, I say to you “Buck up, Sissy Pants!” (Beverly Holfstedder, TBBT.)

Second. In addition, there will be “Good times and riches and sons of a bitches, and you’ll see more than you can recall.” Change your latitude and attitude often. Go to Margaritaville often, but always have a designated driver. (Jimmy Buffet)

Third. Remember, you and your parental units spent big bucks for you to be sitting there. The reason the thing on your head is called a mortar board is because it is fashioned after the flat thing brick layers use to scrap the goo (mortar) that holds brick and stone together. Therefore the one with the strings on the side is to hold your brain together. Don’t blow it by being and doing stupid. Do not aspire to win a Darwin Award. Stupid is as stupid does says Forrest Gump.

Fourth. Learn to spell the word RECEIVE. Do not spell it RECIEVE.

Fifth. Save your tassels. One never knows when life will hit you and you need to make money dancing. Otherwise, just dance. Learn to lead and follow. You get more dance partners that way and dance more often. Also, when your name is called and you feel like dancing when that sheepskin is in your hands, do not let anyone toss you off the stage of graduation or the stage of life when it is your moment.

Sixth. Own a dog and/or cat and be a responsible pet parent.

Seventh. Know that one day you will wake up to sagging boobs, beer bellies, enlarged prostates, swollen joints, peeing in your pants, and forgetting a lot of stuff. Yes, when I was your age I said it was not going to happen to me either.

Eighth. Vote. It does make a difference.

Ninth. Give back and pay it forward.

Tenth. Enjoy YOUR life. It is the only one you have. Be yourself and be comfortable with the person you are. Make your voice heard. Stand up for what you believe in and go make the world a better place.

A toast to all graduates.

Thank you and good luck. Where do I pick up my check? And you said there were refreshments?


Thursday, May 10, 2018 – Out, Out Damn Recliner – Paraphrasing Lady Macbeth

Thursday, May 10, 2018 – Out, Out Damn Recliner – Paraphrasing Lady Macbeth

Thank you to those readers who missed me – all three of you. To get the rest of the readers with of the fake accounts and the bots who say they follow up to speed, let’s catch up.

For those of you who like to get to the bottom line very quickly, “The reason there have been few HWIT posts is: Once I got in the broken recliner, I did not want to get out unless I had too because my knee hurt and I could hardly walk.”

For the others: I hurt my knee about 10 days ago. I wish I could say it was when KB was timing my 60 meter dash as we were attempting to shave off three seconds to get to 19 seconds, but that is not what happened. I tripped over the recliner. All of my body parts save my right knee went over the raised footrest. That was probably the strained ligament part.

Back up to the probable sprained ligament part. I might have done this trying to get out of the recliner when the footrest got stuck in the upright and elevated position. This meant the only body part first exiting the recliner was my right knee with the other body parts rising from extremely awkward positions.

The knee was really painful. I did the RICE thing and took Ibruprofin. RICE means relax, ice, compress, elevate. The first three were easy enough to do, but “elevate” posed a problem. At least the recliner was stuck with the footrest elevated.

The compression part really helped. I hobbled to the local Walgreens and purchased a knee brace made by Mueller. I do not think it is the same Mueller in the news.

But I only have one chair and it was now broken and stuck in upright position. Note: I only have one comfortable chair by choice; it cuts down on company. There are two other chairs available, but one really belongs to Peach, my cat.

So, how did the recliner break? In actuality it was an old recliner, second maybe third hand for my ownership and it was time for it to go to Recliner Heaven.

But the RICE took care of the knee and I am moving around with no brace. I hope that means I will be thinking less that my knee hurts and writing more about other things of equal or less importance.

As for now it is Out, Out Damn Recliner.

Monday, May 07, 2018 – It May All Happen in May

Monday, May 07, 2018 – It May All Happen in May

I am getting bad about not posting something Monday through Friday. There is either too much to think about or lack of interest or thoughts regarding the world. This is also known as “It’s not football season.”

Therefore we must live with what we have at the moment. Here are some May happenings that might be written about later.

We have the Royal Wedding. My invitation has not yet arrived, but if I can’t wear shorts, T-Shirt and tennis shoes, I’m not going. Nor am I getting up to watch it in the wee hours of the morning.

Other wedding news includes the nuptials of Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler and Dr. Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory. I so hope she wears the tiara. I plan to wear mine for the ceremony.

Also coming up in May we have athletic events.

  • NBA playoffs. GO ROCKETS!
  • College World Series – Not seeing the Aggies in Omaha this year.
  • College Softball World Series – My gracious those are some big boned gals on the pitching mound surrounded by eight little skinny ones who run like the wind.
  • World Cup Soccer – I do not give a kick about that.
  • Of course the Astros, but they are just getting started. It is a long, hot summer until September and October.
  • We also have another graduate in the family. Gniece #4 will graduate from law school. Her wish is to have only her immediate family attend. I like that. As I told her, “in the grand scheme of life, it’s just another gathering where you wear a gown/robe and board with strings on the side as a hat.”

Maybe I’ll wear my board with strings hat to the weddings.

Tuesday, May 01, 2018 – It’s May! It’s May! The Lusty Month of May! And the Musical Is?

Tuesday, May 01, 2018 – It’s May! It’s May! The Lusty Month of May! And the Musical Is?

It’s May’ It’s May; the lusty month of May. Can you name that musical? If you can, I will let you take me to the fair.

I can hear the final Jeopardy music playing as you think of (or Google) the answer.

I will give you some hints:

  • The musical premiered on Broadway in 1960 and closed in 1963 after 873 performances. There was a revival of the production in 1981.
  • The Tony for Best Musical that year went to Bye Bye Birdie.
  • The lead for the Broadway version did win the Tony for Best Performance by a Lead Actor.

Here is that Tony winningLead Actor from the 1960 musical in a 1978 version singing the title song. Watch as one of the greatest actors just walks onto the stage, puts his hands in his pockets and opens his mouth.

Don’t let it be forgot
That once there was a spot
For one brief shining moment that was known
As Camelot.