Friday, January 18, 2019 – Lumpy Body Scan

Friday, January 18, 2019 – Fitness Lumpy Body Scan

Let’s play Jeopardy! I’ll take Physical Fitness Stupid for $1000, Alex.

The answer is: gravy, mashed potatoes, coal and me.

What are four things that are lumpy?

Bad Ass trainer talked me into entering a fitness contest. I think I am the only one in the age bracket that can even attempt what she is having me do without having 911 on speed dial and an ambulance on standby in the parking lot.

Yesterday, I did a full 3D body scan at the gym. You stand still while on a rotating platform in your almost birthday suit. I was thinking of the stage in Les Miserable’s.

I thought I was in decent shape. But the numbers don’t lie. I am lumpy – 36% lumpy to be exact in some places. I am not even sure what the rest of the lumpy numbers mean. I look like a fat alien rag doll with stuffing poking out in various places – like my waistline. This reading means that I am only slightly above average. You know how I do not like to be average in anything.

So now I am doing 50 of everything and if it does not kill me it will make me strong. 50 ring rows, 50 squats, 50 stomach crunches, 50 full body push-ups, 50 bicep curls, 50 triceps’ curls and 50 more exercises (like burpees) I do not even want to think about. I do this twice per week and cardio once per week. Then I get on a bicycle or treadmill or row a fake boat. None of them go anywhere.

I have only been “conditioning” as BA says for a week. My body has not been this sore since Coach McGinty’s seventh grade P.E. class. I have to go now and try to find the brain I lost when I said I would do this. For a T-shirt and maybe my picture on the wall? What was I thinking?

 

Wednesday, January 16, 2019 – Winter is Coming

Wednesday, January 16, 2019 – Winter is Coming

Winter is coming! Do you ever wonder if Game of Thrones is actually in the future and not a fantasy of the past? I keep my crown ready just in case it is prophetic instead of dystopian past.

But winter is coming to Texas so they say. On Friday the high temperature in the Brazos Valley is expected to be around 72 and sunny with thunderstorms in the evening. Saturday night the low temperature is projected to be in the upper 20’s with a high in the 50’s on Sunday morning.

As usual I am prepared with the four basic food groups needed for hunkering down. Sweet, salty, alcohol and chocolate. Miss Peach has input and output necessities and is ready to sit on the heated throw in my lap.

But hey! It’s Texas. The following week’s temperature will rise and hover in the sixties and seventies. But alas, February will soon arrive and that means trail rides and rodeos. This always means rain and cold. Real cowboys don’t sleep in motor homes. Just saying.

Everybody stay warm and cover your petunias.

Monday, January 14, 2019 – WE ARE FAMILY!

 

Monday, January 14, 2019 – WE ARE FAMILY!

We are family! I got all my family with me! We are family! Look at what they did for me!

LOOK! I got a Ferrari! OK – we parked by one at Perry’s in The Woodlands

Back to Kristen’s

What’s a good party without a lampshade on your head and a boa around your neck? Kristen – the photo area rocked!

My outstanding twin gnieces!

 

My fabulous and handsome great nephews!

Niece # !

Looks as though Niece # 2 Deewee and I are going to do a dance routine.

As the song says: WE ARE FAMILY! Get up everybody and sing!

Just let me state for the record we’re  giving love in a family dose!

https://youtu.be/XwLjtilAZDQ

 

Friday, January 11, 2019 – You Will Be Assimilated

Friday, January 11, 2019 – You Will Be Assimilated

Captain’s Log 01.11.2019 – Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated. Wait. That is the Borg. We are not going to Delta Quadrant. Who is driving this Starship? We need to change course and warp speed to Septar Quadrant. That is where the Septuagenarians live. At 12:30 AM on Sunday, January 13, I will be assimilated into that decade.

Here is to all of the birth anniversaries born under the sign of Capricorn. Belated birthday wishes to Carol L. and RL on the 6th and 10th respectively. Tomorrow, January 12 we celebrate Molly and Dale and Carol M. days of birth.

Me and Molly Harper Fowler on our 13th birthdays. I do not know if there is a name for a Baptist and Methodist girl when she turns 13.

Then on Sunday, the lovely birthday girls, include, but is not limited to, me, Carolyn Sue, Nova and Debbie F. We all share the day of celebration.

We all invite you to celebrate with all the January birthdays while tapping your toes to another January BD – The Great Earl Scruggs born on Jan 6. I think Foggy Mountain Breakdown is appropriate for us. Don’t you? Engage! Warp Speed to Septar Quadrant.

https://youtu.be/AJOIqmlI65Y

 

Tuesday, January 8, 2019 – Tiger Tiger Burning Bright

Tuesday, January 8, 2019 – Tiger Tiger Burning Bright

Tiger tiger burning bright

In the forests of the night,

What immortal hand or eye

Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?

Fearful symmetry? How about the fearful offense or fearful defense of Clemson? Clemson ran through Alabama like you know what through a goose.

Congratulations to the Clemson Tigers for winning the big trophy stick associated with the National Football Championship. It was fun to see Dabo’s excitement as he ran and jumped along the sideline.

Dear Coach Saban, since you seem to recruit kickers who kick like 70 year old women, I would like to apply for the job next year. Really? A fake field goal? Did a Clemson zombie eat part of your brain?

One of the best parts of the game was the Chevy truck commercial with the Donny and Marie Osmond’s “I’m a little bit country; I’m a little bit rock and roll” as the dialog.

And so we now ask the important question. How many days until kickoff? It is actually 228 days until August 31.

To Clemson, the Texas Aggies shall see you on September 7. To Alabama, the Texas Aggies shall see you on October 1.

To the rest of the college teams, we’ll see you on Monday, January 13, 2020 in New Orleans. I hope Jimbo and Aggies are there!

Until then, Elvis has left the football thinkings until next season. Happy Birthday, Elvis! I believe I will go have a peanut butter and nanner sandwich.

Friday, January 4, 2019 – Snarky Friday

Clemson! Orange is the new Crimson.

ROLL TIDE!

It was a long night in Waco, wasn’t it, Geno? Way To Sic ‘Em Lady Bears!

68-57 over UCONN!

Thursday, January 3, 2019 – I’m Still Mad and PETA

Thursday, January 3, 2019 – I’m Still Mad and PETA

Georgia is still on my mind. You had one thing to do. Next year you can play Notre Dame for The Let Your Fans Down Bowl. The Aggies will see you in Athens.

As soon as Bevo jumped into the crowd, the officials at The University of Texas should have begun their retort letter to PETA. You knew it was coming. PETA it seems does not like live mascots for colleges and universities. This is the same group that wanted to build a twelve foot marble monument in Bryan to the chickens killed in a truck accident on Highway 6. Here’s what I’m thinking. Unless those chickens play football, sing like Lyle Lovett or Robert Earle Keen, there is not going to be a monument to chickens other than this one.

Photo by me 2014

But back to Bevo. Bevo it seems does not like dogs. Read Pulitzer Prize winning Austin American Statesman columnist’s Ken Herman’s take on Bevo, dogs and PETA. I feel certain that PETA poked Bevo.

http://statesman.com/news/20190102/herman-what-spurred-bevos-sugar-bowl-sideline-freakout

Wednesday, January 2, 2019 – And Then There Was One

Wednesday, January 2, 2019 – And Then There Was One

One college football game left. Roll Tide.

Congratulations to LSU, Oklahoma State, Ohio State, and Kentucky on their bowl wins. To any fans from Pennsylvania, your teams must win their bowl games before they are mentioned.

Congratulations to THE University of Texas for their win over Georgia in the Sugar Bowl 28-21. This game was over when Bevo decided to have a pregame snack of an UGA Hot Dawg. Try that with the Miss Reveille, Bevo and you’ll be a steak.

To Georgia: What the hell? The next time you play a major bowl against a major team, may I suggest the following:

    • Bring your head to the game
    • Take your head out of your nether region
    • Use your head to play football
    • Do not underestimate a good team. Almost beating Alabama does not end the season.
    • Do not embarrass the SEC. Texas marched through you like Sherman! The tank, not the general.

To The University, again congratulations. It does indeed appear that The University (TU) is back to original form.

To the mouths talking in the booth last night and everyone else who was a booth mouth during the bowl games:

  • Call the damn football game!
  • Learn the name of the team – it is Oklahoma State or OSU – NOT OKState. You should have known that before your Twitter account exploded from the Oklahoma State fans.
  • No one cares how you played when you were playing.
  • No one cares what play you would have called.
  • No one really cares about your opinions on anything.
  • You do not need to give me the players/coaches profile from day one of their lives.
  • You do not have to fill then entire time between plays with mindless chatter.
  • I heard you the first time. And the second and probably the third time you repeated and/or rephrased what you just said.
  • Please do not refer to Sam Ehlinger as similar to Tim Tebow or anybody else. He is the pride and hope of The University of Texas and he is like Sam Ehlinger.
  • Next year go interview Bevo before the game. Maybe he will show you how the cow ate the New Year’s cabbage.

Only one more football game so it is time to move on to the bouncing round ball. Guess who has a ticket tomorrow night for Baylor and UCONN? See you, Geno!

Tuesday, January 1, 2019 – Happy Whooping New Year!

Tuesday, January 1, 2019 – Happy Whooping New Year!

Well, Skit. Skat. And how bout that?

How about them Aggies? Chomp. Chomp. What away to start a new year!

Congratulations to The Texas Aggie Football team, Coach Jimbo Fisher and Traveon Williams for a great game. Record setting runs for Traveon.

What a game for Cullen Gillespia? The epitome of The Twelfth Man.

Jimbo’s first year: 9 wins and four losses. Losses to Clemson by two and Alabama was scared. Time ran out against Mississippi State and Auburn. And then there was the LSU game followed by a convincing Gator Bowl victory. Not bad, Jimbo.

The final result? As many Aggie shirts now read:

It’s not the way it used to be!

WHOOP!

But that was last year. Today I have on my LSU Tiger T-shirt. It is the formal one with the mardi gras bead design. GEAUX TIGERS!

I am headed to have the traditional New Year’s black eyed peas and cornbread and New Year’s Day football watching. Speaking of Day, here’s to my friend Kathy who achieved a bucket list item today– Seeing Ohio State play in the Rose Bowl. I’ll watch for you KD.  Please wave to me and Ms. Navasota.

Monday, December 31, 2018 – Mamma Called or The Last Time the Aggies were in the Gator Bowl

Monday, December 31, 2018 – Mamma Called or The Last Time the Aggies were in the Gator Bowl

“Mamma called. And when Mama calls, you just have to come runnin.”

Let’s get in the Wayback Machine and return to December 28, 1957. It was a time of floor length formals with frills, white elbow length gloves and the Bowl Queens and their Courts who wore them.

This appears to be a 30 minute promo of the Gator Bowl in 1957. https://youtu.be/EedQfNyCc24 Lots of Gator Bowl Queens, the Tennessee Band, and a little bit of football footage. I wonder if there will be speed boat races this year.

The Texas Aggies were 8-0 and in contention for the National Championship. At one point they had been ranked Number One for three weeks in a row. The running back was Heisman Trophy Winner, John David Crow.

Reverse the Wayback Machine to October 26. Alabama lost to Mississippi State 25 to 13. The Alabama coach, J.B.” Ears” Whitworth was fired. Rumors began to fly down the railroad tracks to College Station. The coach of the Texas Aggies, Paul “Bear” Bryant might leave! Bryant played blocking end for Alabama and graduated in 1936 with a B.S. degree.

The Aggies came undone. The Aggies would lose to Rice (when it was the William M. Rice Institute for the Advancement of the Literature, Science and Art) and to The University of Texas. The Rice quarterback was the great King Hill.

Jimmy Wright, back-up Aggie quarterback, 1954-1956, is quoted to have said “When starting Aggie quarterback, Roddy Oborne threw an interception in the Arkansas game, and Coach Bryant did not say anything, I knew he was gone.”

Because of the losses to Rice and Texas the Aggies dropped out of contention. The Aggies received an invitation to the Gator Bowl in Jacksonville, Florida. It was like the Miss Congeniality of football games at that time. It was not the Rose Bowl. It was not the Cotton Bowl. It was not the Orange Bowl. It was not the Sugar Bowl. Those were the big games. But the Gator Bowl had just enlarged its stadium. It would now seat 43,000.

The Aggies’ opponent was Number 13 ranked The University of Tennessee. In a lackluster, no Aggie spirit, The Volunteers won with a field goal with 5:30 remaining in the fourth quarter to win 3-0.

It would be the last game for Bear Bryant at Texas A&M. The Aggies would not go to a bowl game again until 1968. Paul Bear Bryant would go to Alabama and as they proverbially say “the rest is history.”

When asked why he was going to go to Alabama Bryant was quoted to have said “Mamma called. And when Mama calls, you just have to come runnin.”

And THE University of Texas in 1957? The Horns played Ole Miss (an SEC team) in the Sugar Bowl in New Orleans. It was Darryl K. Royal’s first year as head coach. They lost 39-7 to the Rebels. Hotty Toddy!

BTHO North Carolina State

Go Dawgs!

Happy New Year!