Category Archives: College Football

Friday, July 20, 2018 – Snarky Football Friday – Almost

Friday, July 20, 2018 – Snarky Football Friday – Almost

It is so hot! How hot is it? It is so hot that my hot flashes seem to cool me off!

Every Natural Born Citizen of Texas knows that when God kicked the Devil out of Heaven, He gave him a choice of locations – Texas or Hell. The Devil took Hell because it is cooler than Texas in the summer.

I heard from a most reliable source that it was 108 degrees in Dallas yesterday with possibilities of 112 for the weekend. Be patient my dear Dallas friends. A couple more hurricanes, a few icebergs’ melts and you can cool off at the Beaches of Waco.

Almost every Friday is designated as Snarky Friday. This reminded me that it time to once again review a few of the thoughts behind Here’s What I’m Thinking.

Number ONE: If I know you now or have known you the past, I WILL write about you at some point. You must hope I give you a nickname and write delightful, wonderful memories about you. Otherwise, I might give out the coordinates of your residence and tell FB and social media you are serving free beer on Saturdays.

There are a few exceptions. I will never write anything negative about Ms. Navasota or SFA Roomie and a few selected sorority sisters. Mostly because there is nothing negative I know about these dear friends and also because I’m in the photographs too.

I like college football. I like to write about teams that I like and teams that play teams that I like. This includes the entire SEC (It just means more!); the entire Big 12 Conference, which is still only 10 schools. What about renaming it the Non12 Big School Conference?

I will NOT watch any team play on the blue football field of Boise State. I don’t care if you if you were the first and only for 20 years to have a non-green football field. It ain’t right. It just ain’t right. Besides, it makes me throw up. Eastern Washington has a red football field.That ain’t right either. No exceptions.

I do not like schools that have mascots that could eat Reveille – The First Lady of Aggieland. This includes any school located in Florida. Again, there are exceptions. GEAUX TIGERS! EXCEPT on Thanksgiving.

Of course I write about the Fighting Texas Aggies. Toward the end of her earth-life I told my sister, Dale, that I was not going to join her in Heaven until the Aggies won the National Football Championship. She replied “You cannot live forever!” I was also reminded I must ensure my windows are closed on Saturday afternoons so the neighbors’ grandchildren will not hear me scream multi-syllabic adjectives about one’s parents – especially one’s mother. Or as Dale said “will not hear me screaming cuss words.”

Snarky Friday will preview the football games of my interest. Prepare to hear what I’m thinking about the games, players, the coaches, the referees, the announcers, the uniforms, the signs on Game Day, tailgating and more.

Let us not forget the mascots of the colleges and universities. Do we all remember from last year – the meaning of the adjective regarding anthropomorphic as it relates to mascots?

The first games of the season will kick off on Saturday, August 25 with more games on Thursday, August 30 and continuing through Labor Day Weekend.

The shine to Saint Football. Since I do not like real candles, I light lights on Saturday and pretend it’s church.

The Aggies kickoff on Thursday August 30 in College Station against Northwestern. The smaller Northwestern in Louisiana. Not the big one in Illinois. Nevertheless, it is going to be hotter than the hinges of Hell in Kyle Field.

Happy Weekend.

Wednesday, July 18, 2018 – Poems from The Wasteland by T. S. Eliot and Me

Wednesday, July 18, 2018 – Poems from The Wasteland by T. S. Eliot and Me

I don’t care if T. S. Eliot wrote that April is the cruelest month. He never lived in Texas in July. Here’s what I’m thinking. My version is more accurate. But you should judge for yourself.

 

From The Wasteland by T. S. Eliot

APRIL is the cruellest month, breeding.
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing.
Memory and desire, stirring.
Dull roots with spring rain.

From The Wastebasket by Me

JULY is the cruellest month, sweating.

Beads out of the dehydrated body, wanting

Memory and desire, stirring.

Cooler temps and football season.

Monday, July 16, 2017 – It Begins! SEC Media Day And Gig ‘Em!

Monday, July 16, 2017 – It Begins! SEC Media Day And Gig ‘Em!

In honor of the first of four days of SEC football coverage and what I consider the official start of college football, I have rewritten one song and selected two other songs to commemorate the kickoff.

Here is the first one. I know all my sorority sisters know the tune. This is an Aggie version.

Today while the maroon and white blossoms still cling to the vine

I’ll watch the SEC Media and drink real good wine.

A million tomorrows will all pass away…

Ere I forget what all Jimbo said today.

For I’m a Former Student and also a scholar

You know who I am by the clothes that I wear.

I’ll feast at a tailgate and record ESPN

Who cares about Corsier’s head gear.

We can’t be contented with yesterday’s glory

We can’t live on promises winter to spring

Today is our moment and now is our glory.

We’ll laugh and we’ll fight and we’ll sing.

And here is what we will sing! The second song is especially for the Bevo Bunch since it mentions THE University.

WHOOP!

https://youtu.be/M3XkxbIQ_Mo

Thursday, July 12, 2018 – Texas A&M Cancels Entire Fall Semester

Thursday, July 12, 2018 – Texas A&M Cancels Entire Fall Semester – Good Bull

This is a headline today from the Department of fake news.

Texas A&M cancels entire fall semester to accommodate Thursday night football game in August.

Here’s what I’m thinking. This from Good Bull is every undergraduates’ dream come true. I think it is an excellent idea, Jimbo. I don’t think any SEC school actually has classes during football season, do they? Maybe Vanderbilt.

https://www.goodbullhunting.com/2018/7/11/17560924/texas-a-m-cancels-entire-fall-semester-to-accommodate-thursday-football-game-in-august-aggies-fake?soc_src=community&soc_trk=ma

Monday, July 09, 2018 – On the Cover of the Rolling Stone or Texas Football Magazine

Monday, July 09, 2018 – On the Cover of the Rolling Stone or Texas Football Magazine

Well, we’re big rock singers, we got golden fingers, and we’re loved everywhere we go; we sing about beauty and we sing about truth; at 75 million a show.

Rolling Stone – Gonna see my picture on the cover; Gonna buy five copies for my mother, gonna see my smiling face on the cover of The Rolling Stone.

It’s all designed to blow our minds; but our minds wont’ really be blown; like the blow that will get you when you get your picture on cover of The Rolling Stone.

Just keep getting richer, but we can’t get our picture on the cover of the Rolling Stone

But on the Cover of Dave Campbell’s Texas Football.

https://youtu.be/-Ux3-a9RE1Q

Saturday, July 07, 2018 – CFWS – Cornhole Royalty or Snarky Friday Delayed

Saturday, July 07, 2018 – CFWS – Cornhole Royalty or Snarky Friday Delayed

Me: So, Doctor. There is nothing that can be done for CFWS?

Doctor: I’m afraid not. I see many patients this time of year who suffer from College Football Withdrawal Symptom (CFWD.) One must wait it out until August when it goes away. In the meantime, I can only suggest you watch something from previous years on TV. That Longhorn Network has many contests from previous years since that is all THE University has. Or you find something else to tide you over.

Therefore I returned home and after an extensive search of every sports channel I subscribed to and I discovered a sport to hold me over until August. CORNHOLE!

Initially, I thought the sport was called Corn Row, but I later found out that corn row refers to an ethnic hair style.

In cornhole individual contestants or a team of two underhandedly toss four bags filled with corn kernels. No, the kernels are not cooked. Contestants, across a distance of 27 feet toss the bag in an attempt to drop the bag into a hole cut out of a board that is elevated about six inches from the floor to form an incline. Three points are awarded if the bag goes into the hole and one point if the bag lands on the inclined board. First player or team to reach 21 wins that round.

There were several attributes that drew me to this sport. One – I always enjoy a sport where one can hold their beer and cigarette in one hand and toss an object with the other. Similar to Frisbee golf. Except cornhole is even better than Frisbee golf because it can be played indoors.

Some of the rules of the game I liked were: Decide who tosses first – usually the ugliest or drunkest. I also liked: Clear debris from boards – especially dog poop and cornhole is no place for children as they tend to run onto the playing area. A nice corn bag to the head usually acts as a deterrent.

A second attribute that attracted me to cornhole was: People actually do this? My mama used to make us bean bags all the time when we were little. We threw bean bags into all kinds of holes and at each other and the dog and the cat. Too bad none of us thought to put college logos or paint beer advertising on the board and sell it to whoever is making money now.

But the third and biggest attribute that made me like cornhole was the Royalty. The National Cornhole Championships were held in West Virginia last year. Yes, West Virginia, there is a National Cornhole Championship. Remember, this is the state that burns old sofas when West Virginia U wins football games.

There is even a governing organization. It is the American Cornhole Organization, with a podcast called Talking American Cornhole Organization or TACO. https://americancornhole.com/

At the National Cornhole Championship both a King and Queen are crowned. Just think – BJ, JP, Dale – You could be the Queen of the Cornhole. http://www.espn.com/video/clip?id=11244789

And if things could not get better – the 2018 Cornhole Championship will be held July 24 through July 28 in Montgomery, Alabama. There is still time to register! You could be Queen of Largest Cornhole Party Ever and even be on TACO.

https://youtu.be/WBMEwl2J6HI

Monday, July 2, 2018 – Is It Time for College Football Yet?

Monday, July 2, 2018 – Is It Time for College Football Yet?

Good Grief, Charlie Brown! It is already July 2. I think missed the final days of June.

What have we missed? Arkansas Hogs got roasted in the College World Series by Oregon State Beavers. What a way to lose it too! One out away from winning the CWS and you miss the foul ball. That memory is going to take a long time to go away.

Nevertheless, the end of the CWS just means one yard closer to college football season. I can’t wait.

Did you see where former LSU Coach Les Miles’ son is transferring from Nebraska to Texas A&M? He will be eligible next season. He is a fullback. A FULLBACK at Texas A&M?

I have not yet purchased the Texas bible of football – Dave Campbell’s Texas Football. I shall have it by tomorrow. I understand that Texas A&M Head Football Coach, Jimbo Fisher, is on the cover. Flashback: Last year THE University of Texas HC, Tom Herman, on the cover was no advantage.

The story in Texas Football supposedly says when Jimbo saw the previous head coach’s office at Texas A&M he said something like “Good God! It looks like a damn night club in here. I’m not moving in until remodeled.” I hope there are Before and After pictures.

I must stop and go to store to get ready for the Fourth of July. I’ll buy hot dogs, but no buns! The “no buns” story is one to be told with alcohol and hot dogs. And buns.

However, before I stop and go shop, I would like to make this public. On Friday June 20, 2018, I received $20, cash on the barrel head, from one Mr. J. Hawkins. I believe this is Alabama within the spread over Texas A&M. Is that correct?

I would like see Mr. Hawkins’ $20 and raise him a bottle of wine on Texas A&M within the spread and raise our Emergency Room Deductible.

RIP Billy Cannon

Sunday, May 20, 2018 – RIP Billy Cannon

Please tell cousin Donnie and sister Dale hello.

 

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Cheer, cheer for old Notre Dame,
Wake up the echoes cheering her name,
Send a volley cheer on high,
Shake down the thunder from the sky.
What though the odds be great or small
Old Notre Dame will win over all,
While her loyal sons are marching
Onward to victory.

If you missed the final seconds of the women’s Division I National basketball championship yesterday, it is worth a google to see the last seconds, even if you do not like basketball. ND is going to need a mural with Three point Jesus to compliment Touchdown Jesus.

At least it wasn’t UConn. Congratulations to Muffett McGraw and Notre Dame and congratulations of Vic Sheafer and the Mississippi State Bulldogs. Congratulations to all of the teams for giving fans one of the most exciting women’s brackets of basketball in years. It was literally a record setting (and breath taking) Final Four preceded by games played by outstanding young women displaying superb athletic skills.

Tonight the men’s Division I National Championship in basketball will be decided between Michigan and Villanova to close out the 2018 basketball season.

Here’s what I’m thinking. Watch out for the Catholics again. And how many days until football season begins?

 

Monday, January 8, 2018 – It’s My New Year and I’ll Start When I Want To

Monday, January 8, 2018 – It’s My New Year and I’ll Start When I Want To

Paraphrasing the Doo Wop Queen, Leslie Gore –

It’s my New Year and I’ll start when I want to; start when I want to; You can start too, when it happens to you.

I apologize for only one post last week. It was 22 degrees at two o’clock in the afternoon in Texas. Note: We Native Born Texans think 40 degrees warrants a coat, gloves, hats and boots. I was comfortable in a Lazy-Boy, under a heated blanket, with a good book and a fur baby curled up asleep in my lap. You would not have moved either. In fact, most of you that I was texting were not moving.

So what is happening that we might have missed? Tonight is the biggest night in college football. When the clock reads 00.00 at the end, I will already be counting the days until Saturday, September 1 when the Texas Aggies kickoff against Northwestern State. I will make Natchitoches meat pies to tailgate. Not looking ahead by any means, but Clemson is coming to Kyle Field the next weekend.

Meanwhile, ROLL TIDE.

I do wish the POTUS was not attending the game. Regardless of one’s thoughts regarding the President, one must admit he is a lightning rod. I wish the game would not become a political football. I just want to watch people have a good time and watch young people trying to make the world a better place.

Speaking of the future and the 2020 POTUS let us all just calm down about Oprah’s 2020 presidency. Let us first focus on 2018. As we hopefully have learned, “One great speech does not a president make.”

Nevertheless, here’s what I’m thinking regarding Oprah Winfrey’s Golden Globe speech as she accepted the Cecil B. DeMille Award for lifetime achievement. It was uplifting to hear words of hope and promise and delivered with thought and conviction. It was refreshing to hear an articulate, well-spoken individual give a sincere and dignified speech without bombastic naming calling of institutions and individuals.

It is a brand new year. I am ready for my close up, Mr. DeMille because Time’s Up!

Let me just end with one of my favorite sayings from one of my favorite people, Ms. Odessia Ross.

Years after Odessia and I graduated from Magnolia High School in 1967 we were talking one day. We shared five college degrees between us and countless certificates. I remember making a statement that I in 1967 really wanted to be a medical doctor, but there were no women out there beating down the doors.”

Odessia replied, “D, Black girls did not even know there were doors out there.”

New Year. New Day.