Category Archives: humor

Tuesday, April 24, 2018 – Dirty Bird or Foul Fowl

Tuesday, April 24, 2018 – Dirty Bird or Foul Fowl

I have a murmuration of starlings. Google murmuration. Google starling.

Ok, there are only a couple of these nasty birds, but they are building their nasty nest above my front door. This means baby starlings are not far behind. This creates a poop deluge for those coming to the front door. I am not certain if my homeowners insurance covers “poop accidents” if someone slips and falls due to droppings.

While Peach, the cat, finds them fascinating to watch, I will not feel bad when I go wash away their nest this afternoon. Then maybe I’ll watch Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds. I still wonder how they got the house so clean after hundreds of birds were in the living room. This scene is before Tippy goes to the attic. Actually, those birds did not poop either. That green suit she had on is spotless when Rod Taylor rescues her.

There are only two birds outside my front door. They have only been there two days, but there is already poop. Therefore, I must go wash away the birds’ nest.

I’ll listen to these truly inspirational bird words from The Trashmen from 1963 while washing the front door. Bird, bird, bird is the word…

 

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Cheer, cheer for old Notre Dame,
Wake up the echoes cheering her name,
Send a volley cheer on high,
Shake down the thunder from the sky.
What though the odds be great or small
Old Notre Dame will win over all,
While her loyal sons are marching
Onward to victory.

If you missed the final seconds of the women’s Division I National basketball championship yesterday, it is worth a google to see the last seconds, even if you do not like basketball. ND is going to need a mural with Three point Jesus to compliment Touchdown Jesus.

At least it wasn’t UConn. Congratulations to Muffett McGraw and Notre Dame and congratulations of Vic Sheafer and the Mississippi State Bulldogs. Congratulations to all of the teams for giving fans one of the most exciting women’s brackets of basketball in years. It was literally a record setting (and breath taking) Final Four preceded by games played by outstanding young women displaying superb athletic skills.

Tonight the men’s Division I National Championship in basketball will be decided between Michigan and Villanova to close out the 2018 basketball season.

Here’s what I’m thinking. Watch out for the Catholics again. And how many days until football season begins?

 

Wednesday March 28, 2018 – A Peach Takeover

Wednesday March 28, 2018 – A Peach Takeover

Peach here. Dr. Biped is napping during the rain. I just woke up to do the input and output thing. Saw the camera and I decided to take a selfie.

I hope you like it. Love Peach.

Now back to my nap. Let me wake up Dr. Biped to let her know I’m back and ready to nap.

Tuesday, March 27, 2018 – Rust is a Color – Attention Old Hippies

Tuesday, March 27, 2018 – Rust is a Color – Attention Old Hippies

If you have been following Here’s What I’m Thinking, you know that Ms. Navasota and I channeled our inner Joan Baez on Saturday. We returned to the thrilling days of yesteryear when we once walked in our bell bottoms and carried signs that said “hooray for our side.” Music aficionados from the 1960’s actually know that “hooray for our side” is a Buffalo Springfield song and not Joan Baez.

Here we are leaving for the protest march.

Note the Elvis Presley (The King) hood ornament

I am riding shotgun

 

Here we are stopping on the side of the road on the way to the protest of guns in schools. Love those back roads of Texas. Also love those unplanned shots that allow one to add the constant of their choice to read however they choose. Duck and repair will work.

Even though we our protests were rusty, nevertheless we persisted. It did take us back to a time when the world was in chaos. Believe it or not we were once 18 and 19 year olds and even high school students just like students today who want to make the world a safer place. It brought make many memories

“But we both know what memories can bring. They bring diamonds and rust. And if you’re offering me diamonds and rust, I’ve already paid.”

And that is Joan Baez.

Friday, March 23, 2018 – Weekend Events

Friday, March 23, 2018 – Weekend Events

I know. I was absent for two days. My bad.

The clock ran out on the Texas Aggie men’s team last night. It rained three pointers for Michigan all night long. Still proud of you Ags! But as usual, it is the women who will have to take control and BTHO Notre Dame.

What an exciting weekend we have awaiting us. It is the Sweet Sixteen for the women’s basketball teams. Still in are: Texas A&M, Baylor and THE University of Texas. Baylor plays Oregon State at 6 and The UT plays UCLA 8:00 tonight.

The Aggie women play ND tomorrow at 3:00 on ESPN. Dear God, about that stomach virus for the Irish, tonight would be a good time for it to sweep through the team. PS – Sister Jean loves the Aggies!

Because of the late game and because it is The Big Event in BCS, the March for Lives on campus does not begin until 5:00. Therefore Ms. Navasota and I will move our March for Our Lives protest to the courthouse square in Brenham. This time slot fits better for our food and drink schedule.

I am wondering what to write on my sign. Suggestions are most welcome. I still my flag shirt from 1969.

So HWIT – “I wore this shirt in 1969. I did NOT plan to wear it when I was 69 years old and having to do this crap again.”Marching on to other weekend events. Sunday is Palm Sunday marking the beginning Holy Week for Christians. With so many TV offerings, I hope the 60 Minutes Interview with the President El Dick Tator’s porn star mistress does not interfere evening church services or with Charlton Heston (former NRA President) and The Ten Commandments.

Happy Week End.

Praise the Lord and Pass the damn basketball!

BTHO ND!

Monday, March 19, 2018 – WHOOP! There It Is! WHOOSH! There It Is!

Monday, March 19, 2018 – WHOOP! There It Is! WHOOSH! There It Is!

You come on like a dream,

Reveille’s the Queen,

Shots like maroon and white wine;

You’re 16 and you’re beautiful and you’re

OUR FIGHTING TEXAS AGGIES BASKETBALL TEAMS!

The Madness of March is awesome and we are only half way through.

Sunday- Texas Aggie Women versus DePaul – Way to show up 12th Man! The women needed us from the tip off to the amazing Chennedy Carter three pointer with 2.8 seconds left to go ahead 80-79. Down 17 points, this was the fourth biggest come back in NCAA basketball history.

http://http://www.espn.com/video/clip?id=228239

http://es.pn/2GE7HXD via @ESPN App http://es.pn/app

Jasmine Lumpkin- what a steal to seal the game. And of course, Lashes – Anriel Howard – outstanding performance from the Queen of Rebounds with the points to match to keep the Aggies in the game.

Bring it Muffet and the Leprechauns! The Aggies are going to party like it was 2011. Note: for the non Aggie women’s basketball followers. Texas A&M defeated Notre Dame to win the National Championship in 2011. Game date and time TBD.

All of the blue hairs, gray hairs and no hairs were seeking CPR and other breathing devices as we left Reed Arena, but we anxiously hurried home to find a second miracle on TV. The Number two seeded University of North Carolina Tar Heels were behind and the Aggie men were playing like they were possessed!Thank goodness this was never a close game. I am sure that two NCAA Tournament Aggie basketball games equal one Aggie football game in terms of cussing, holding breath, slamming the dammit doll and more. Bring it Michigan. March 22, 6:37 on TBS.

And we are just at the half way mark to one of the best March Madness times ever.

Cheers to UMBC Retrievers, Texas Southern Tigers, Houston Cougars and all of the others who got to dance and be a part of history.

Cheers to Sister Jean and team from Loyola Chicago still making history.

Tonight’s women’s game – Here’s to Geno and UConn – you either need to play in the Men’s NIT or spot Quinnipiac 25 points to start the game. You know, like a golf handicap. May a brief, but severe stomach bug invade your digestive track

BTHO – Notre Dame

BTHO – Michigan

 

 

 

Tuesday, March 13, 2018 – March Madness and Bracket Racket

9088888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 – Get off of the keyboard, Peach.

Tuesday, March 13, 2018 – March Madness and Bracket Racket

Everybody Dance Now! The Madness of March is upon us and brackets are filled with teams headed to The Big Dance. I must hurry to complete my bracket on the men’s side. The games start tonight. Here are a few of my favorite teams this year.

Since these teams will not last long I hope they enjoy while they are there with their locations and mascots.

  • UMBC – University of Maryland Baltimore County – Retrievers with a mascot named True Grit
  • UNCG – University of North Carolina at Greensboro – Spartans
  • LIU Brooklyn – Long Island University Brooklyn – Blackbirds
  • Radford – Radford Virginia – Highlanders
  • Lipscomb – Nashville Tennessee, Lu the Bison

Then the big boys begin on Friday. My favorites are:

  • Any team that plays Texas Tech starting with Stephen F. Austin in Dallas on Friday. Give ‘Em the Ax, Jacks. But Beware the Ides of March.
  • The Texas Aggies – the outcome depends on which team shows up l.or who gets suspended for stupidity. The Aggies play the Providence Friars. BTHO the Friars.

Four teams will get the opportunity to spend an April Easter in San Antonio. If you are not watching Charles Barkley and friends’ commercials about Texas you are missing a good laugh.

On the women’s side my favorite teams are

Any team that plays UConn. Actually, I think UConn should be a number 16 seed on the men’s side.

Any team that plays Louisville. Whoa! Could there be an opportunity for Baylor to pay back from a time before?

Any team that plays Notre Dame. Muffet, you are going to have long dance with only six players. You will indeed need the Luck of the Irish.

Princeton – I like to listen to the announcers during Princeton game. It goes something like this: “Mary is a 6 foot junior forward from Chicago. She is a Merit scholar with a double major in biochemical engineering and cybersecurity with minors in Russian and American history. She speaks French, Spanish and Russian.”

The Aggie Women open Friday with Drake. I wonder if they will play Drake music while they warm up. As with the Aggie men, it will depend on which team shows up to play as to how deep into the dance we go.

I have no clue who will win the man’s Championship. On the women’s side – Mississippi State – THIS IS YOUR YEAR! Look for the Bulldogs in Columbus Ohio on Easter Sunday. TY6szzzzzz6yyyyyyyyy – Stop it Peach.

Completed brackets tomorrow. Let’s go Radford.

I think this means Peach is picking Xavier on the men’s bracket.

Xaqw         q1190

Wednesday, March 07, 2018 – How Cool and How Come?

Wednesday, March 07, 2018 – How Cool and How Come?

I found some family ephemera (fancy talk for old family stuff like pictures of people you do know know). I am sure, much to the delight of my family, I donated it to LSU. My name will officially be in a museum. Thank you LSU Alum, Kathy for the help.

Remember LSU is a land grant school and when the Morrill Act was passed all land grant schools were required to have a military component. Google the Morrill Act if you did not attend a land grant school. Today of course, there is only one land grant school with a Corps of Cadets of any value. Of course that is the Harvard on the Brazos – aka Texas A&M University. Therefore, it is only right and honorable that this Texas Aggie makes a donation. How cool is that?

The photographs were of cadets of LSU and some old buildings the LSU history people recognized immediately. The dates on the back were 1905 from the Old War Skule. This date is two years before my father was born and my aunt was only three years old. I have no idea who the cadets are or where the photographs came from.

When downloading my museum donation form I ran across this from the LSU Old War Skule site posted February 26, this year. http://olewarskule.lsu.edu/?p=3302

Chairs of Honor. POW/MIA permanent seats were installed in Tiger Stadium, Maravich Assembly Center, and Alex Box Stadium and are guarded by ROTC members during home games.

Here’s what I’m thinking. How come there are no POW/MIA seats in every college stadium/arena and sports venue? And especially how come there are not any in Kyle Field and Reed Arena? And Blue Bell Park and the softball ball and soccer stadium?

What do you think about the idea? Share it Aggies!

 

Wrong Absurd and Disgusting

Monday, March 5, 2018 – Wrong Absurd and Disgusting

Did you see this picture? It is allegedly something called Brooklyn Barbeque.

What an oxymoron. There is no such thing as Brooklyn barbeque. That is like eating salsa from New York City. That platter looks as disgusting as sushi from a gas station.

This is an insult to states that know barbeque and pit bosses everywhere. States like Kansas, Tennessee, both Carolinas and of course Texas. There is good barbeque in many other states too. New York is not one of them.

Brooklyn Bridge 1986 – Photo by me

Here’s what I’m thinking. You couldn’t give that away to a Texan even if the bridge came as a bonus. Just not buying it. Wrong!

March 2, 2018 – Texas Independence Day

March 2, 2018 – Texas Independence Day

Howdy, Ya’ll. This here is Texas Independence Day. On this day in 1836 leaders of the revolution met at Washington on the Brazos. Here 59 delegates officially signed a document declaring their independence and creating The Republic of Texas.

This day and the resulting history makes us Texans what we are and feel and act the way that we do.  As John Steinbeck said, “Texas is a state of mind.” But he continues with a description of The Lone Star State.

I have said that Texas is a state of mind, but I think it is more than that. It is a mystique closely approximating a religion. And this is true to the extent that people either passionately love Texas or passionately hate it and as in other religions few people dare to inspect it for fear of losing their bearings in mystery or paradox. But I think there will be little quarrel with my feeling that Texas is one thing. For all its enormous range of space, climate and physical appearance, and for all the internal squabbles, contentions and strivings. Texas has tight cohesiveness perhaps strong than any other section of America. Rich, poor, Panhandle, Gulf, city, country, Texas is the obsession, the proper study and the passionate possession of all Texans.

John Steinbeck (1902-1968) in Travels with Charley: In Search of America.

God Bless Texas!