Category Archives: Alabama

Monday, July 09, 2018 – On the Cover of the Rolling Stone or Texas Football Magazine

Monday, July 09, 2018 – On the Cover of the Rolling Stone or Texas Football Magazine

Well, we’re big rock singers, we got golden fingers, and we’re loved everywhere we go; we sing about beauty and we sing about truth; at 75 million a show.

Rolling Stone – Gonna see my picture on the cover; Gonna buy five copies for my mother, gonna see my smiling face on the cover of The Rolling Stone.

It’s all designed to blow our minds; but our minds wont’ really be blown; like the blow that will get you when you get your picture on cover of The Rolling Stone.

Just keep getting richer, but we can’t get our picture on the cover of the Rolling Stone

But on the Cover of Dave Campbell’s Texas Football.

https://youtu.be/-Ux3-a9RE1Q

Saturday, July 07, 2018 – CFWS – Cornhole Royalty or Snarky Friday Delayed

Saturday, July 07, 2018 – CFWS – Cornhole Royalty or Snarky Friday Delayed

Me: So, Doctor. There is nothing that can be done for CFWS?

Doctor: I’m afraid not. I see many patients this time of year who suffer from College Football Withdrawal Symptom (CFWD.) One must wait it out until August when it goes away. In the meantime, I can only suggest you watch something from previous years on TV. That Longhorn Network has many contests from previous years since that is all THE University has. Or you find something else to tide you over.

Therefore I returned home and after an extensive search of every sports channel I subscribed to and I discovered a sport to hold me over until August. CORNHOLE!

Initially, I thought the sport was called Corn Row, but I later found out that corn row refers to an ethnic hair style.

In cornhole individual contestants or a team of two underhandedly toss four bags filled with corn kernels. No, the kernels are not cooked. Contestants, across a distance of 27 feet toss the bag in an attempt to drop the bag into a hole cut out of a board that is elevated about six inches from the floor to form an incline. Three points are awarded if the bag goes into the hole and one point if the bag lands on the inclined board. First player or team to reach 21 wins that round.

There were several attributes that drew me to this sport. One – I always enjoy a sport where one can hold their beer and cigarette in one hand and toss an object with the other. Similar to Frisbee golf. Except cornhole is even better than Frisbee golf because it can be played indoors.

Some of the rules of the game I liked were: Decide who tosses first – usually the ugliest or drunkest. I also liked: Clear debris from boards – especially dog poop and cornhole is no place for children as they tend to run onto the playing area. A nice corn bag to the head usually acts as a deterrent.

A second attribute that attracted me to cornhole was: People actually do this? My mama used to make us bean bags all the time when we were little. We threw bean bags into all kinds of holes and at each other and the dog and the cat. Too bad none of us thought to put college logos or paint beer advertising on the board and sell it to whoever is making money now.

But the third and biggest attribute that made me like cornhole was the Royalty. The National Cornhole Championships were held in West Virginia last year. Yes, West Virginia, there is a National Cornhole Championship. Remember, this is the state that burns old sofas when West Virginia U wins football games.

There is even a governing organization. It is the American Cornhole Organization, with a podcast called Talking American Cornhole Organization or TACO. https://americancornhole.com/

At the National Cornhole Championship both a King and Queen are crowned. Just think – BJ, JP, Dale – You could be the Queen of the Cornhole. http://www.espn.com/video/clip?id=11244789

And if things could not get better – the 2018 Cornhole Championship will be held July 24 through July 28 in Montgomery, Alabama. There is still time to register! You could be Queen of Largest Cornhole Party Ever and even be on TACO.

https://youtu.be/WBMEwl2J6HI

Monday, July 2, 2018 – Is It Time for College Football Yet?

Monday, July 2, 2018 – Is It Time for College Football Yet?

Good Grief, Charlie Brown! It is already July 2. I think missed the final days of June.

What have we missed? Arkansas Hogs got roasted in the College World Series by Oregon State Beavers. What a way to lose it too! One out away from winning the CWS and you miss the foul ball. That memory is going to take a long time to go away.

Nevertheless, the end of the CWS just means one yard closer to college football season. I can’t wait.

Did you see where former LSU Coach Les Miles’ son is transferring from Nebraska to Texas A&M? He will be eligible next season. He is a fullback. A FULLBACK at Texas A&M?

I have not yet purchased the Texas bible of football – Dave Campbell’s Texas Football. I shall have it by tomorrow. I understand that Texas A&M Head Football Coach, Jimbo Fisher, is on the cover. Flashback: Last year THE University of Texas HC, Tom Herman, on the cover was no advantage.

The story in Texas Football supposedly says when Jimbo saw the previous head coach’s office at Texas A&M he said something like “Good God! It looks like a damn night club in here. I’m not moving in until remodeled.” I hope there are Before and After pictures.

I must stop and go to store to get ready for the Fourth of July. I’ll buy hot dogs, but no buns! The “no buns” story is one to be told with alcohol and hot dogs. And buns.

However, before I stop and go shop, I would like to make this public. On Friday June 20, 2018, I received $20, cash on the barrel head, from one Mr. J. Hawkins. I believe this is Alabama within the spread over Texas A&M. Is that correct?

I would like see Mr. Hawkins’ $20 and raise him a bottle of wine on Texas A&M within the spread and raise our Emergency Room Deductible.

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Monday, April 2, 2018 – While Her Loyal Sons are Shooting Onward with a THREE!

Cheer, cheer for old Notre Dame,
Wake up the echoes cheering her name,
Send a volley cheer on high,
Shake down the thunder from the sky.
What though the odds be great or small
Old Notre Dame will win over all,
While her loyal sons are marching
Onward to victory.

If you missed the final seconds of the women’s Division I National basketball championship yesterday, it is worth a google to see the last seconds, even if you do not like basketball. ND is going to need a mural with Three point Jesus to compliment Touchdown Jesus.

At least it wasn’t UConn. Congratulations to Muffett McGraw and Notre Dame and congratulations of Vic Sheafer and the Mississippi State Bulldogs. Congratulations to all of the teams for giving fans one of the most exciting women’s brackets of basketball in years. It was literally a record setting (and breath taking) Final Four preceded by games played by outstanding young women displaying superb athletic skills.

Tonight the men’s Division I National Championship in basketball will be decided between Michigan and Villanova to close out the 2018 basketball season.

Here’s what I’m thinking. Watch out for the Catholics again. And how many days until football season begins?

 

Monday, January 8, 2018 – It’s My New Year and I’ll Start When I Want To

Monday, January 8, 2018 – It’s My New Year and I’ll Start When I Want To

Paraphrasing the Doo Wop Queen, Leslie Gore –

It’s my New Year and I’ll start when I want to; start when I want to; You can start too, when it happens to you.

I apologize for only one post last week. It was 22 degrees at two o’clock in the afternoon in Texas. Note: We Native Born Texans think 40 degrees warrants a coat, gloves, hats and boots. I was comfortable in a Lazy-Boy, under a heated blanket, with a good book and a fur baby curled up asleep in my lap. You would not have moved either. In fact, most of you that I was texting were not moving.

So what is happening that we might have missed? Tonight is the biggest night in college football. When the clock reads 00.00 at the end, I will already be counting the days until Saturday, September 1 when the Texas Aggies kickoff against Northwestern State. I will make Natchitoches meat pies to tailgate. Not looking ahead by any means, but Clemson is coming to Kyle Field the next weekend.

Meanwhile, ROLL TIDE.

I do wish the POTUS was not attending the game. Regardless of one’s thoughts regarding the President, one must admit he is a lightning rod. I wish the game would not become a political football. I just want to watch people have a good time and watch young people trying to make the world a better place.

Speaking of the future and the 2020 POTUS let us all just calm down about Oprah’s 2020 presidency. Let us first focus on 2018. As we hopefully have learned, “One great speech does not a president make.”

Nevertheless, here’s what I’m thinking regarding Oprah Winfrey’s Golden Globe speech as she accepted the Cecil B. DeMille Award for lifetime achievement. It was uplifting to hear words of hope and promise and delivered with thought and conviction. It was refreshing to hear an articulate, well-spoken individual give a sincere and dignified speech without bombastic naming calling of institutions and individuals.

It is a brand new year. I am ready for my close up, Mr. DeMille because Time’s Up!

Let me just end with one of my favorite sayings from one of my favorite people, Ms. Odessia Ross.

Years after Odessia and I graduated from Magnolia High School in 1967 we were talking one day. We shared five college degrees between us and countless certificates. I remember making a statement that I in 1967 really wanted to be a medical doctor, but there were no women out there beating down the doors.”

Odessia replied, “D, Black girls did not even know there were doors out there.”

New Year. New Day.

Tuesday, January 2, 2018 – Happy New Year and How Bout them Bowl Games?

Tuesday, January 2, 2018 – Happy New Year and How Bout them Bowl Games?

Welcome 2018! I hope your team won yesterday and in previous bowl games too. For many teams, like the Aggies and LSU time ran out. Thank you to Mississippi State, South Carolina, Georgia and Alabama. The rest of the SEC – Missouri, Kentucky, and Auburn sucked.  Nevertheless, this year the National Championship Football trophy will reside in the SEC.

I can hear the screams and whines now. I feel certain the other football conferences are letting the committee know of their unhappiness with one conference represented. You know Coach Meyers and The Ohio State Buckeyes are not happy. The Pac 12 is squealing.  Maybe they Pac 12 is just upset being 1-7 in bowl games.  The Big 12 is still stunned from the Rose Bowl, but will soon complain and realize THE University of Texas could very well be back to Longhorn form in 2018.

It is what it is. Next Monday we get to watch the game for the Championship and the opportunity to take the crystal football to Wal-Marts throughout Georgia or Alabama. It is going to be fun to watch.

Here’s hoping the 2019 championship will also feature an SEC school too. Oh Great Football Swami and Predictor of Greatness, please let it be the Texas Aggies!

Meanwhile,

ROLL TIDE.

Saturday, December 30, 2017 – The Last Saturday of the Year.

It is the last Saturday in the year 2017. Tomorrow begins the countdown to a New Year beginning with the month of January. This begins the month of celebration for those of us fortunate to be born in the month named allegedly after the Roman god Janus.

In ancient Roman religion and myth, Janus is the god of beginnings, gates, transitions, time, duality, doorways, passages, and endings. He is usually depicted as having two faces, since he looks to the future and to the past.

Janus presided over the beginning and ending of conflict, and hence war and peace. The doors of his temple were open in time of war, and closed to mark the peace.

New Year’s Eve is a time for reflection and contemplations. Being a Capricorn born in January I am very good at looking backwards (history nerd) and envisioning the future (educator).

Thank you to all of you who follow Here’s What I’m Thinking. One of the things I will be reflecting upon tomorrow is “why?” I do hope it makes you smile/laugh and/or think.

So HWIT on this last Saturday of 2017. Here’s to US as in all of us and the United States of America. For the year 2018, let us smoothly pass through new beginnings, doorways and passages to achieve the sacrifices that freedom and justice demand.

Conroe, Texas. Photo by me.

Stay warm. Stay safe. Be sure to cover your petunia. See you next year.

But two items before I sign off: 1. Baker Mayfield – in today’s interview, you look like an old fashioned Oklahoma cow paddy. Hope you got the grit to do in The Dawgs.

  1. ROLL TIDE!

Monday, December 11, 2017 – Tom Lehrer and The Roy Moore Victory Song – Vote Doug Jones!

Monday, December 11, 2017 – Tom Lehrer and The Roy Moore Victory Song – Vote Doug Jones!

Good Morning, Music History Class,

Today we will examine victory songs that for whatever reason did not become popular. Take for example, The Confederate Victory Song.

Cindy Lee don’t wring your hankie; I just shot me a Yankee

Tell the slaves to keep on working in the fields.

While still popular in certain parts of The South today, those four days in Gettysburg in 1863 put a damper on that tune.

But we have this never made it tune from April 1912 first recorded by Ice Berg.

Bon Voyage to you new Titanic; you’re the greatest ship on the sea; Bon Voyage to you new Titanic, say ‘Hello’ to the Statue of Liberty; We know with what your costing you’re unsinkable; to wish you a safe crossing is unthinkable

Another from the lost vaults of no victory songs include from 1937:

There’ll be a hot, hot time in Lakehurst, New Jersey when the Hindenburg lands today.

It has the great line:

All the way from Germany, you’ve flown her to us and we know that the motto was New Jersey or bust!

Ah yes, we have such great songs as “We’ll all be there to meet her When Amelia Earhart Circles the Globe” and the ever popular Custer’s Victory Song from Little Big Horn.

When the great satirist, Tom Lehrer recorded the following song first in 1953 in Boston and then with Songs Revisited in 1960 and again in 1966, I suspect he never foresaw or hoped to see individuals who still actually believe the world was better then. The 1960’s were violent enough let alone the 1860’s!

Dear Mr. Lehrer,

If you have a problem with I Want to Go Back to Dixie as the Roy Moore Victory Song, let me know.

Satirically, yours,

DrD

Dear Voters of Alabama,

Do the right thing and vote for Doug Jones.

Unless, you wanna go back to Dixie, as when “things were better” as suggested by Roy Moore.

From Twitter: Jesus said “Go forth and sin no more.” Not “Go forth and sin Roy Moore.”

Seriously concerned US Citizen with current voter registration card in Texas,

DrD

https://youtu.be/HAwhC_btAUU

The text and a sing along.

Well, what I like to do on formal occasions like this is to take some of the various types of songs that we all know and presumably love, and, as it were, to kick them when they’re down. I find if you take the various popular song forms to their logical extremes, you can arrive at almost anything from the ridiculous to the obscene, or — as they say in New York — sophisticated. I’d like to illustrate with several hundred examples for you this evening, first of all, the Southern type song about the wonders of the American South. But it’s always seemed to me that most of these song really don’t go far enough. The following song, on the other hand, goes too far. It’s called I wanna go back to Dixie.

I wanna go back to Dixie,
Take me back to dear ol’ Dixie,
That’s the only li’l ol’ place for li’l ol’ me.
Ol’ times there are not forgotten,
Whuppin’ slaves and sellin’ cotton,
And waitin’ for the Robert E. Lee.
(it was never there on time.)
I’ll go back to the Swanee,
Where pellagra makes you scrawny,
And the honeysuckle clutters up the vine
I really am a-fixin’
To go home and start a-mixin’
Down below that Mason-Dixon line.

Oh, poll tax, how I love ya, how I love ya,
My dear old poll tax.

Won’tcha come with me to alabammy,
Back to the arms of my dear ol’ mammy,
Her cookin’s lousy and her hands are clammy,
But what the hell, it’s home.
Yes, for paradise the southland is my nominee.
Jes’ give me a ham hock and a grit of hominy.

I wanna go back to Dixie
I wanna be a dixie pixie
And eat cornpone ’til it’s comin’ outta my ears
I wanna talk with southern gentlemen
And put my white sheet on again,
I ain’t seen one good lynchin’ in years.
The land of the boll weevil,
Where the laws are medieval,
Is callin’ me to come and nevermore roam.
I wanna go back to the southland,
That “y’all” and “shet-ma-mouth” land,
Be it ever so decadent,
There’s no place like home.

 

Monday, December 11, 2017 – Tom Lehrer and The Roy Moore Victory Song – Vote Doug Jones!

Monday, December 11, 2017 – Tom Lehrer and The Roy Moore Victory Song – Vote Doug Jones!

Good Morning, Music History Class,

Today we will examine victory songs that for whatever reason did not become popular. Take for example, The Confederate Victory Song.

Cindy Lee don’t wring your hankie; I just shot me a Yankee

Tell the slaves to keep on working in the fields.

While still popular in certain parts of The South today, those four days in Gettysburg in 1863 put a damper on that tune.

But we have this never made it tune from April 1912 first recorded by Ice Berg.

Bon Voyage to you new Titanic; you’re the greatest ship on the sea; Bon Voyage to you new Titanic, say ‘Hello’ to the Statue of Liberty; We know with what your costing you’re unsinkable; to wish you a safe crossing is unthinkable

Another from the lost vaults of no victory songs include from 1937:

There’ll be a hot, hot time in Lakehurst, New Jersey when the Hindenburg lands today.

It has the great line:

All the way from Germany, you’ve flown her to us and we know that the motto was New Jersey or bust!

Ah yes, we have such great songs as “We’ll all be there to meet her When Amelia Earhart Circles the Globe” and the ever popular Custer’s Victory Song from Little Big Horn.

When the great satirist, Tom Lehrer recorded the following song first in 1953 in Boston and then with Songs Revisited in 1960 and again in 1966, I suspect he never foresaw or hoped to see individuals who still actually believe the world was better then. The 1960’s were violent enough let alone the 1860’s!

Dear Mr. Lehrer,

If you have a problem with I Want to Go Back to Dixie as the Roy Moore Victory Song, let me know.

Satirically, yours,

DrD

Dear Voters of Alabama,

Do the right thing and vote for Doug Jones.

Unless, you wanna go back to Dixie, as when “things were better” as suggested by Roy Moore.

From Twitter: Jesus said “Go forth and sin no more.” Not “Go forth and sin Roy Moore.”

Seriously concerned US Citizen with current voter registration card in Texas,

DrD

https://youtu.be/HAwhC_btAUU

The text and a sing along.

Well, what I like to do on formal occasions like this is to take some of the various types of songs that we all know and presumably love, and, as it were, to kick them when they’re down. I find if you take the various popular song forms to their logical extremes, you can arrive at almost anything from the ridiculous to the obscene, or — as they say in New York — sophisticated. I’d like to illustrate with several hundred examples for you this evening, first of all, the Southern type song about the wonders of the American South. But it’s always seemed to me that most of these song really don’t go far enough. The following song, on the other hand, goes too far. It’s called I wanna go back to Dixie.

I wanna go back to Dixie,
Take me back to dear ol’ Dixie,
That’s the only li’l ol’ place for li’l ol’ me.
Ol’ times there are not forgotten,
Whuppin’ slaves and sellin’ cotton,
And waitin’ for the Robert E. Lee.
(it was never there on time.)
I’ll go back to the Swanee,
Where pellagra makes you scrawny,
And the honeysuckle clutters up the vine
I really am a-fixin’
To go home and start a-mixin’
Down below that Mason-Dixon line.

Oh, poll tax, how I love ya, how I love ya,
My dear old poll tax.

Won’tcha come with me to alabammy,
Back to the arms of my dear ol’ mammy,
Her cookin’s lousy and her hands are clammy,
But what the hell, it’s home.
Yes, for paradise the southland is my nominee.
Jes’ give me a ham hock and a grit of hominy.

I wanna go back to Dixie
I wanna be a dixie pixie
And eat cornpone ’til it’s comin’ outta my ears
I wanna talk with southern gentlemen
And put my white sheet on again,
I ain’t seen one good lynchin’ in years.
The land of the boll weevil,
Where the laws are medieval,
Is callin’ me to come and nevermore roam.
I wanna go back to the southland,
That “y’all” and “shet-ma-mouth” land,
Be it ever so decadent,
There’s no place like home.

 

Monday, December 04, 2017 – The Game of Bowls and The Coaching Game of Thrones

Monday, December 04, 2017 – The Game of Bowls and The Coaching Game of Thrones

I see this morning that the ESPN site has a guide to the upcoming college bowl games. Here’s what I’m thinking – Here is my guide to the upcoming college football bowl games.

From ESPN “For the first time since 2014 there were more bowl-eligible football teams than spots to compete this year.”

Me: That is because the bowl standards are too low; there are too many unqualified teams, there are too many bowl games, but it makes money for all involved.

You may divide your bowl games as you wish. I have divided my bowl games into the following categories:

  • The No Count Bowls,
  • The Never Heard of Before Bowls,
  • The No One Cares unless you or your child and money go there Bowls,
  • The Advertising and T-shirt Sales Bowls,
  • The SEC Bowl,
  • The Last Aggie Bowl Game before the Jimbo Era and of course
  • The Big Playoff Bowls.

This listing is incomplete, but I will update as we approach the days.

Noon on ABC on Dec. 16 – The Celebration Bowl – North Carolina A&T vs Grambling. I hope they show halftime and the Grambling Band. That is always something to celebrate.

1:00 on ESPN – The R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl with Troy and North Texas. What is this? R+L = X? The Algebra Bowl? Still it is in NOLA, so who cares?

The AutoNation Cure Bowl – Western Kentucky vs Georgia State at 2:30 CBSSN. From Orlando. Oh my, the Cure of the Nation is left up to these two teams and these states?

The Las Vegas Bowl – No. 25 Boise State vs. Oregon 3:30 on ABC. Thank goodness it is not on that seizure causing Boise State blue football field. I would bet $50 those Oregon yellow highlighters against the field would make me throw up.

The GILDAN New Mexico Bowl –Marshall versus Colorado State 4:30 ESPN. Never heard GILDON?

Raycom Media Camellia Bowl – Middle Tennessee vs Arkansas State ESPN. Might be fun.

The Goodyear Cotton Bowl has No. 8 USC vs No. 5 THE Ohio State. I call this one The Consolation Bowl Game or The Get Over It Ohio State and play better schedules Bowl.

The Play Station Fiesta Bowl has No. 11 Washington vs No. 9 Penn State on Dec 30 at 4:00 on ESPN. Why don’t you just do this one on a Play Station and we can all play? We can call it The Play Station Fan Interactive Bowl.

The Chick-fil-A-Peach Bowl with No. 12 UCF vs No. 7 Auburn. My cat, Peach, insists on watching this one, but she knows better than to purr for Auburn.

The Capitol One Orange Bowl – No.10 Miami vs No. 6 Wisconsin. What’s in Your Wallet? On Wisconsin!

TaxSlayer Bowl: Louisville 23 vs Mississippi State on Dec 30 on ESPN at noon. These two teams and states are now in charge of the new tax bill?

The AutoZone Liberty Bowl has Iowa State vs 20 Memphis Dec 30 at 12:30 on ABC. Yuk.

The Outback Bowl has Michigan vs South Carolina. I would rather go eat at Outback than watch.

The Citrus Bowl finds No. 17 LSU vs No. 14 Notre Dame on New Year’s Day on ABC. One of my most favs and one of my least favs. Bless me Father for I have sinned, but LSU is going to win.

The Camping World Bowl has No. 22 Virginia Tech vs No. 19 Oklahoma State. Does one have to camp out? If the Mountaineers win, will they burn the couches at their campsites?

The Valero Alamo Bowl in beautiful San Antonio has Stanford vs TCU at 9:00 ESPN. A fun city to have a bowl game regardless of who plays. This should be called The Tree Frog Bowl. Think about it!

The San Diego County Credit Union Holiday Bowl has No. 18 Washington State vs Michigan State. Go Leach!

The Walk-On’s Independence Bowl on Dec 27 has Florida State vs Southern Mississippi. The WALK ON BOWL? Can I play?

The Arizona Bowl New Mexico State Utah State on Dec 29. Oh boy! The Utes!

The Texas Bowl – THE University of Texas and Missouri. Really? You know the Aggies (and most any other team) would have brought a bigger crowd to Houston!

Again from ESPN: On Dec 29 “the former FSU Coach, Jimbo Fisher, will lead his new team, Texas A&M against Wake Forest in the Belk bowl.”

  1. What the Hell is the Belk Bowl?
  2. WAKE FOREST?
  3. Jimbo’s coaching???
  4. He does look good in a maroon blazer!
  5. Why did he come to the SEC? Watch out, Saban. The Aggies are coming and We Are Fearless!

Will those be the years of Championships????

I know I have left out some teams and bowl games, but the ESPN app crashed so I’m done for today except for the big Bowls.

5:00 on ESPN – The Rose Bowl – No. 3 Georgia and No.2 Oklahoma. I love a parade. Going to The Rose Bowl Parade is on my bucket list. As much as it pains me: Boomer Sooners!

8:45 on ESPN – The Sugar Bowl – No.4 Alabama v # 1 Clemson. These two and their fans in Nawlins!!! How fun is this? ROLL TIDE.