Tag Archives: ESPN Game Day 2017

Friday, September 8, 2017 – Snarky Friday Before College Football Saturday

Friday, September 8, 2017 – Snarky Friday Before College Football Saturday

The Snark of Friday is here and is very angry. To the person who send a letter of racial hatred and bigotry to the Sumlin Family: THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. Your behavior is disgusting and reprehensible.

Football is a game. College football is an opportunity for many young men to succeed on the field and off. To criticize a coach due to perceived coaching abilities and even to express the desire for a replacement are well within the boundaries of the game. Alumni do not pay for mediocrity. To attack a coach’s family with such vitriolic spewed hatred and then to end it with a threat, is wrong for any family.

From the statement issued by Texas A&M AD Scott Woodward, “We unequivocally condemn this disgusting and threating letter. There is no excuse for hatred and as a community; we will not allow the ignorance of some to intimidate any member of our community.”

To the sender of the letter: May a plague of poxes fall upon your house that brings swarming locusts and grasshoppers, mounds of fire ants, moles in your flower beds, bed bugs in your mattresses, roaches in every room and leaks in the roof throughout your house.

Now moving down field.

From last evening congratulations to Sammy Bearkat and the Boys from Sam Houston in the win over Prairie View A&M 44-31. Not quite enough scare for a Poopie Undies Award Sam, but I will give you Skids Award. Well done, PVA&M.

Our football evening begins tonight with Pistol Pete and the Oklahoma State Cowboys. We shall find the Pokes playing South Alabama at 7:00 on ESPN2. If I were any team from Alabama, I would be watching Oklahoma State – even you in Saban land.

Tomorrow begins at 9:00 with ESPN Game. One of my football goals is to get a selfie with Kirk Herbstreit. I think he is cute and when Fowler scared him last Halloween with a spider and he screamed like a girl, I knew I wanted to meet him.

Thank goodness, apparently no one I care about is playing at the ungodly hour of 11:00 AM.

Screen # 3 – So the day begins with TCU and Arkansas entertaining us in old Southwest Conference rematch at 2:30 on CBS. Go FROGS!

Screen # 2 – Opposite the Frogs and Pigs we find THE University of Texas Longhorns trying to see if they can answer the question “Do you know the way to San Jose?” Kick-off is at 2:30 in DKR Memorial Stadium with Texas versus San Jose State on the Long Horn Network.

Screen # 1 -On my main screen aka Living Room (as in there’s an elephant in the room) –

My friend Celeste and a pack of pachyderms.

will be#1  Alabama versus Fresno State at 2:30 on ESPN2 in Tuscaloosa. Hounds Tooth hats for everyone! ROLL TIDE!

On Fox Sports Southwest – At the truly beautiful McLane Stadium in Waco on the Brazos the Road Runners from University of Texas San Antonio meet Baylor @7:00. New Rhule: Do not take the Road Runners lightly and try not to look like Wiley Coyote like you did last week. Sic ‘Em Bears.

Pardon me Mike? Is that the Chattanooga Choo – choos?” Why yes, Mike, The Tiger, LSU plays Chattanooga at 6:30 on the SECN. The Chattanooga mascot is named after legendary football coach A.C. “Scrappy” Moore, Scrappy, the Chattanooga mascot, is a fixture for the Mocs. A re-design in 2008 puts Scrappy in the image of the State Bird of Tennessee, a Mockingbird. Thank goodness, I thought it might be a water moccasin. YUM. Cats like birds.

Not Relief Out shirts, but proceeds from these also go to Harvey relief efforts.

At 6:00 from Kyle Field we have a Relief Out game between Texas A&M v Nicholls State on ESPNU. All Harvey evacuees in the Brazos Valley were given free tickets. Fans will Relief Out the stadium by filling it with fans wearing Hurricane Harvey Relief shirts. All proceeds go to Harvey Relief efforts. Should provide an intimidating stadium for The Colonels. There will be more people in Kyle Field than live in Thibodaux, Louisiana.

Wearing Big Boy Uniforms playing big boy games we have the #13 Auburn Hair Color versus the # 3 Clemson Tigers @ 6:00 ESPN. Oh, both teams are the Tigers? Roll Tide.

On ABC at 6:30 we have the Sooners from “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOklahoma where the winds come sweeping down the plains” playing Ohio State Buckeyes. I am sorry. I do not know any Ohio State songs. If I get to meet Mr. Herbstreit, may he can me teach one.

Hope your team wins and

BTHO Nicholls State

August 21, 2017 – Monday After College Football Awards

August 21, 2017 – Monday After College Football Awards

This time next Monday there will actually be awards to be handed out in my Monday After College Football Awards.

Since it has been a seemingly eternity since there was college football, let us review some of these prestigious awards that I make up for the football faithful followers.

The Ugliest Uniforms goes to the team(s) that appear in yellow highlighters, glow in the dark stripes or designs, and any shade of orange. These are designed by the Hellen Keller, Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder departments at Nike, Adidas and Under Armor.

Ugliest Helmets Awards have their own category. If I am unable to determine the design on the helmet it is very likely that team will receive an Ugliest Helmet Award.

The Hot Seat Award is given to the coach whose coaching seat is questionable each week. The number one hot seat is currently occupied by Texas A&M Coach, Kevin Sumlin. The number two hot seat is occupied by UCLA Coach, Jim Mora. These two coaches and teams meet in the Rose Bowl on September 3.

Many teams often receive the weekly Poo Poo Undies Award. This trophy is awarded to the fans whose teams survive a game winning field goal, a missed Hail Mary pass to the end zone and/or survive in overtime.

There are the Exploding Coaches Awards. These usually go to Alabama’s Nick Saban for throwing the headphones or South Carolina’s Uncle Will Muschamp just because his face turns really red. Maybe it is an SEC thing.

Of course there will be my Best and Worst Broadcasters Awards. It will be difficult to upset my always Best Broadcaster Boyfriend, Kirk Herbstreit and the fellows from ESPN Game Day (Not the old man!). But with Brent Mushburger silent this year, the Worse Broadcaster is a wide open category. I am expecting Jesse Palmer to be a contender. He and those who relive their days on the gridiron from decades ago instead of calling the plays all have chance.

This year I am introducing a new award. It is called The Big Solid Pass Interception for Touchdown Award. There are actually two awards. One is given to the linebacker or safety that intercepts the quarterback’s pass and runs for a touchdown.

The second award is given to the fan base whose team throws the interception to the linebacker or safety and cusses the loudest and in the most colorful language.

Of course there will awards for the zebra people, the various mascots, chants and yells and anything else I can think of. After all, it is called Here’s What I’m Thinking.

So as we say in Aggieland – Howdy Dammit! And Thank God It’s Football Season. Gig ‘Em!

Friday, May 26, 2017 – Snarky Friday Football – 93 Days

Friday, May 26, 2017 – Snarky Friday Football – 93 Days

Ninety-three days till kick off begins

Ninety-three days till then

Tomorrow begins 92 and

We start all over again.

Ninety-two days till kick off begins …

It depends on the source as to exactly the number of days until NCAA College Football begins. I do not care as long as it begins. Here are some thoughts of what I am thinking as we wait anxiously for college kick off weekend.

Why are Stanford and Rice playing in Australia? Will the Rice MOB play Tie e kangaroo down, Sport and jump around the field? Perhaps they will play Waltzing Matilda and waltz in formation. Will the Leland Stanford Jr. College Band be off of probation to attend?

Is ESPN Game Day coming to College Station? Kirk Herbstreit, can ya’ll please come? I promise this year I will personally bring you barbecue from Fargo’s so I can meet you and take a selfie with all of you. Mr. Herbstreit and Mr. Howard, I would so love to have a photo of us doing a quarterback pose and the Heisman pose. I would like this because both of you are hotties and I am a 68 year old woman and can still do the poses and not fall over or break a hip. Mr. Fowler is pretty cute, but that Corso guy? Please do not let him photo bomb our pictures.

When do Texas Aggie Maroon Out 2017 shirts go on sale? Maroon Out 2017 shirts go on sale June 1. And every Aggie and Former Student knows: it is not about the shirt. It is the 12th Man! Gig ‘Em! http://classcouncils.tamu.edu/node/132

When is Maroon Out Game for 2017? The Maroon Out game has not been determined. HWIT – I am going to ensure my shirt is clean and ready to tailgate on October 7 when the Crimson Tide Rolls in. It could be October 28 when the Bulldogs from Mississippi State visit. That would really be a maroon filled stadium though. http://www.12thman.com/schedule.aspx?path=football

Just realized I have not said too many snarky comments. Therefore, let me say:

Big 12 Conference! OU – we’re leaving. Oklahoma State – we’re going to win it.

Kansas State – Snyder is still alive. Kansas – when does basketball season begin? Iowa State – why are you even in this conference? West Virginia – Can be spoilers to hopes, but I think Dana is cute.

Texas Tech – Is this coaching seat hot or is it just me? TCU – Do these purple pants make me look fat? Yes, Patterson, they do. Baylor – praying for a resurrection in Waco.

THE University of Texas – Hook ‘Em Hippies and it better be quickly.

Snarky Friday – 92 days till kick off begins; 92 days till then …

January 1, 2017 – HAPPY NEW YEAR! The First Day of the New Year.

January 1, 2017 – HAPPY NEW YEAR! The First Day of the New Year.

“Staring down a greasy taco plate; bowl of menudo on the side… We were drinking and swinging from the chandeliers…” Ah once upon a time, but no more, but thank you Roger Creager for the memories.

Before I get to my 2017 Predictions, I wanted to share a few really cool gifts I received for Christmas. This first one came totally unexpected. I like those so much – especially when the gift is spot on!



While the giver knows my love for cameras, what the giver does not know is that this scency is a replica of the first camera I ever learned to use at Magnolia High School in 1966-67. Imagine this happening today. The Conroe Courier gave every yearbook editor in Montgomery County one of these very expensive cameras to use for the year provided we attended a Saturday morning class on how to use it.


Yes, photography peeps, they trusted a group of teenagers with state of the art, news reporter quality, Leica lens cameras. We were to use the camera to take photographs of school events – aka football games! Such good memories and I am going to be hitting my house with the smell good in 2017.

I liked this too. Angry Mama to clean your microwave.

mad-mama-576x1024As dirty as my microwave is she will probably explode the first time she tries to clean mine. I wonder if she comes in an Angry Mama to clean your house.

Here is a favorite. I got this combination science and magic kit. It seems that the elixir on the left has magic potions of St Belvedere. When poured properly into the magic beaker on the right, the perfect tini temperature is achieved. vodka-576x1024

I cannot wait to try it. It was gift from Pootie and Russians to commemorate taking Poland in 1945.

And now my 2017 New Year’s Day Predictions – just for the first month or so.

Donald Trump will be sworn in via Twitter.

All of the Kardashians and their exes will perform at Donald Trump’s inauguration. I don’t know what they are going to do. What they always do, I suppose, nothing, but dress up and post their photos in Instagram.

Kate McKinnon and Alex Baldwin will not perform at Donald Trump’s inauguration, but will continue to make us laugh on SNL. So love you, Kate!

Rick Perry will lead the dancing at the Inaugural Ball for President Donald and First Lady Melanoma.

Donald Trump and Vlad Putin (aka Pootie) will dance via distance learning a Bromance line dance like Cossacks that creates a viral meme at 3:00 am in the morning. Warning: Putin will be shirtless.

Dancing with the Stars will once again bring us in high definition broken down, old stars, and never heard of before people trying to learn to dance while wearing sequins and feathers.

On January 9, 2017, from Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Florida for the National College Athletic Association Division FBS 2017 National Championship, invented by Larry Culpepper, we have the Crimson Tide from Alabama versus the Tigers of Clemson from South Carolina. Sidebar: Thank goodness the announcers are the always professional team of Chris Fowler, Samantha Ponder, Tom Rinaldi and my boyfriend want to be, Kirk Herbstreit. Can’t wait for ESPN Game Day this fall. Please come back to Aggieland. And my prediction: ROLLLLLLLL TIDE! Like I even know anybody who even claims they went to Clemson and I don’t like orange in any shade.

Dak, Eskielle and The Boys will win Super Bowl LI (what number is this in Roman?) in Houston in NRG Stadium – home of the Houston Texans. Houston and Texan fans will hate Dallas and The Cowboys even more. Hey! For you non-native born Texans – It’s about oil ya’ll. Football is just a hobby to show off.

Time to go have science experiment, practice Russian and eat black eyed peas and cornbread. Happy New Year’s Day!