Category Archives: Coach Nick Saban

Friday, August 31, 2018 – Snarky Friday

Friday, August 31, 2018 – Snarky Friday

Happy Snarky Football Friday. Last night we had the opportunity to see two schools’ fund raisers to fund their entire athletic department. Pistol Pete and the Cowboys of Oklahoma State beat Missouri State 58-17. That Mullet is looking good, Mike.

Kyle Field 8.30.18 Photo by KB

Of course my eyes were glued to the Texas Aggies versus Northwestern State. I told you, Demons, that Kyle Field was loud. Three false starts in a row on the first series. Twelfth Man.

Of course we all held our breath when Northwestern scored in the Fourth Quarter. So what if the Aggies were ahead 50+ to zero. Final score Aggies 59 and Northwestern 7 plus a large percentage the gate receipts like Missouri State gets.

In the horrible 11:00 AM spot on Saturday we have following games with teams who must have done something back to get stuck here.

In the O-State battle we find Ohio State and Oregon State on ABC. The Beavers and Suspension.

Also at the non-football game time of 11 am we find THE University of Texas and Maryland on FS 1. Was it really necessary to throw Texas coach, Tom Herman, under that bus because he went to a strip club with the domestic abuser? What are you trying to do? Go dot your “I” with a tuba, Ohio State.

Hotty Totty, God Almighty! On ESPN we have the Rebels of Old Miss and the Raiders of Texas Tech. I do not think you are allowed to throw tortillas at NRG Stadium in Houston or write graffiti on the buses, Tech.

The Sooners of Oklahoma and QB Kyler Murray take on FAU (whoever that is and I’m too lazy to look it up) on FOX. I hope Murray has gained some weight. When he played for Texas A&M, he looked like he was one tackle away from a body cast.

Clemson and Furman kickoff at 11:20 on ACC Network. Come on Furman Paladins. Hope Clemson is looking ahead to next week.

The dogs are let out at 2:30 when the Washington Huskies meet the Auburn Tigers. This could be big for both the PAC 12 and the SEC conferences. It’s on ABC.

Opposite on CBS we find the Georgia Bulldogs playing the Austin Peay Governors. UGA going to peay all over the Governors.

Speaking of bulldogs. At 6:30 on ESPNU it’s the Lumberjacks of Stephen F. Austin and the Mississippi State Bulldogs. I must root for SFA since I have papers from there. However, I fear that Bullie will pee on the pines before the Jacks can give them the Ax.

In the big game, the Tide comes rolling in as Alabama and Louisville kickoff at 7:00 on ABC. In a Snark closing, I would like to say the following to all of the sports mouths. Nick Saban will decide who starts at quarterback for Alabama. All of you mouths are just speculating. I’m sure if Coach Saban needs your input he will call you. Roll Tide.

Thursday, August 23, 2018 – One Week and It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year – College Football Begins

Thursday, August 23, 2018 – One Week and It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year – College Football Begins

Follow the bouncing football and sing along to my version of It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year. Click on the arrow for the instrumental.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year;

The Aggies are Gigging,

The Cowbells are ringing,

The Tigers are here!

It’s the most wonderful time of the year.

It’s the hap, happiest season of all;

The Hogs are a rooting,

The Gamecocks are roosting,

The Gators are tall,

It’s the hap, happiest season of all.

They’ll be tailgates for hosting

With brags and such boastings

From bowl games from long, long ago.

There’ll be Nick Saban stories

Of tales of past glories

With Championship Rings just for show.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year.

The Horns are a Hooking,

The Bears are a looking,

The Cowboys are feared,

It’s the most wonderful time …

It’s the most wonderful time …

It’s the most wonderful time of the year.

Friday, August 17, 2018 – Snarky Friday

Friday, August 17, 2018 – Snarky Friday

Come along and be my party school; Come along and be my party school; come along and be my party school and I’ll flunk out with you.

Twelve thousand (12,000) Aggies move in this weekend. That is the estimated amount moving in to live on campus. This does not include off campus residents. Classes begin on August 27. I do not know why the first day of classes is not August 30. Might as well add to the total transportation and confusion on campus with Reveille VIII’s internment, freshman ticket pull, the SEC trucks setting up, tailgating and the season opener for the football team.

Snarking onward through the fog…

See where your alma mater or your school of support lays on this grid of Academics and Partying. I am confident the research done by Barstool Sports is accurate, reliable, and valid. I can speak from experience that research conducted in bars becomes louder and less reliable as the tequila shots become more abundant.

https://www.barstoolsports.com/barstoolu/an-advanced-analytical-look-at-the-academics-partying-college-chart-going-viral/

 

Here are my interpretations. I see most of the SEC conference in the Most Party/Least Academic quadrant, including Alabama, Auburn, LSU, Mississippi State and Ole Miss. Of course the Texas Aggies are Most Party/High Academic. Remember that an often forgotten attribute of why the SEC wanted the Aggies was – to raise the GPA of the SEC. Georgia in the same quadrant as the Aggies? Really? You host the Largest Cocktail Party when you play Florida!

From the Big 12 I see Texas Tech as Most Party/Least Academic. Of course if I had to live in Lubbock I would have to party 24/7. I see Baylor as Most Academic/Least Party. The surveyors obviously did not interview members of my family regarding the party aspect. Oklahoma State appears to be Most Party and Low academics. Again, if I had to live in Stillwater, I would do the same as if I lived in Lubbock. THE University of Texas at Austin in the High Party/High Academic. TU, just because you are in the same quadrant as Stanford, you cannot compete with them academically. Smart people versus super smart people.

I see BYU as the Least Party/Most Academic. Those Mormons don’t even drink Dr. Peppers! The Most Party/Least Academic “honor” goes to The University of West Virginia – Moonshine University where they burn sofas and couches when the football team wins.

I hope you can find you school of support. It appears many lie bunched around or on the axis.

It is indeed time for colleges and universities to move in and start to party. As the adage says “College is a fountain of knowledge where kids go to drink.” But don’t drink and drive.

Wednesday, July 18, 2018 – Poems from The Wasteland by T. S. Eliot and Me

Wednesday, July 18, 2018 – Poems from The Wasteland by T. S. Eliot and Me

I don’t care if T. S. Eliot wrote that April is the cruelest month. He never lived in Texas in July. Here’s what I’m thinking. My version is more accurate. But you should judge for yourself.

 

From The Wasteland by T. S. Eliot

APRIL is the cruellest month, breeding.
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing.
Memory and desire, stirring.
Dull roots with spring rain.

From The Wastebasket by Me

JULY is the cruellest month, sweating.

Beads out of the dehydrated body, wanting

Memory and desire, stirring.

Cooler temps and football season.

Monday, July 16, 2017 – It Begins! SEC Media Day And Gig ‘Em!

Monday, July 16, 2017 – It Begins! SEC Media Day And Gig ‘Em!

In honor of the first of four days of SEC football coverage and what I consider the official start of college football, I have rewritten one song and selected two other songs to commemorate the kickoff.

Here is the first one. I know all my sorority sisters know the tune. This is an Aggie version.

Today while the maroon and white blossoms still cling to the vine

I’ll watch the SEC Media and drink real good wine.

A million tomorrows will all pass away…

Ere I forget what all Jimbo said today.

For I’m a Former Student and also a scholar

You know who I am by the clothes that I wear.

I’ll feast at a tailgate and record ESPN

Who cares about Corsier’s head gear.

We can’t be contented with yesterday’s glory

We can’t live on promises winter to spring

Today is our moment and now is our glory.

We’ll laugh and we’ll fight and we’ll sing.

And here is what we will sing! The second song is especially for the Bevo Bunch since it mentions THE University.

WHOOP!

https://youtu.be/M3XkxbIQ_Mo

Monday, July 2, 2018 – Is It Time for College Football Yet?

Monday, July 2, 2018 – Is It Time for College Football Yet?

Good Grief, Charlie Brown! It is already July 2. I think missed the final days of June.

What have we missed? Arkansas Hogs got roasted in the College World Series by Oregon State Beavers. What a way to lose it too! One out away from winning the CWS and you miss the foul ball. That memory is going to take a long time to go away.

Nevertheless, the end of the CWS just means one yard closer to college football season. I can’t wait.

Did you see where former LSU Coach Les Miles’ son is transferring from Nebraska to Texas A&M? He will be eligible next season. He is a fullback. A FULLBACK at Texas A&M?

I have not yet purchased the Texas bible of football – Dave Campbell’s Texas Football. I shall have it by tomorrow. I understand that Texas A&M Head Football Coach, Jimbo Fisher, is on the cover. Flashback: Last year THE University of Texas HC, Tom Herman, on the cover was no advantage.

The story in Texas Football supposedly says when Jimbo saw the previous head coach’s office at Texas A&M he said something like “Good God! It looks like a damn night club in here. I’m not moving in until remodeled.” I hope there are Before and After pictures.

I must stop and go to store to get ready for the Fourth of July. I’ll buy hot dogs, but no buns! The “no buns” story is one to be told with alcohol and hot dogs. And buns.

However, before I stop and go shop, I would like to make this public. On Friday June 20, 2018, I received $20, cash on the barrel head, from one Mr. J. Hawkins. I believe this is Alabama within the spread over Texas A&M. Is that correct?

I would like see Mr. Hawkins’ $20 and raise him a bottle of wine on Texas A&M within the spread and raise our Emergency Room Deductible.

Tuesday, January 2, 2018 – Happy New Year and How Bout them Bowl Games?

Tuesday, January 2, 2018 – Happy New Year and How Bout them Bowl Games?

Welcome 2018! I hope your team won yesterday and in previous bowl games too. For many teams, like the Aggies and LSU time ran out. Thank you to Mississippi State, South Carolina, Georgia and Alabama. The rest of the SEC – Missouri, Kentucky, and Auburn sucked.  Nevertheless, this year the National Championship Football trophy will reside in the SEC.

I can hear the screams and whines now. I feel certain the other football conferences are letting the committee know of their unhappiness with one conference represented. You know Coach Meyers and The Ohio State Buckeyes are not happy. The Pac 12 is squealing.  Maybe they Pac 12 is just upset being 1-7 in bowl games.  The Big 12 is still stunned from the Rose Bowl, but will soon complain and realize THE University of Texas could very well be back to Longhorn form in 2018.

It is what it is. Next Monday we get to watch the game for the Championship and the opportunity to take the crystal football to Wal-Marts throughout Georgia or Alabama. It is going to be fun to watch.

Here’s hoping the 2019 championship will also feature an SEC school too. Oh Great Football Swami and Predictor of Greatness, please let it be the Texas Aggies!

Meanwhile,

ROLL TIDE.

Saturday, December 30, 2017 – The Last Saturday of the Year.

It is the last Saturday in the year 2017. Tomorrow begins the countdown to a New Year beginning with the month of January. This begins the month of celebration for those of us fortunate to be born in the month named allegedly after the Roman god Janus.

In ancient Roman religion and myth, Janus is the god of beginnings, gates, transitions, time, duality, doorways, passages, and endings. He is usually depicted as having two faces, since he looks to the future and to the past.

Janus presided over the beginning and ending of conflict, and hence war and peace. The doors of his temple were open in time of war, and closed to mark the peace.

New Year’s Eve is a time for reflection and contemplations. Being a Capricorn born in January I am very good at looking backwards (history nerd) and envisioning the future (educator).

Thank you to all of you who follow Here’s What I’m Thinking. One of the things I will be reflecting upon tomorrow is “why?” I do hope it makes you smile/laugh and/or think.

So HWIT on this last Saturday of 2017. Here’s to US as in all of us and the United States of America. For the year 2018, let us smoothly pass through new beginnings, doorways and passages to achieve the sacrifices that freedom and justice demand.

Conroe, Texas. Photo by me.

Stay warm. Stay safe. Be sure to cover your petunia. See you next year.

But two items before I sign off: 1. Baker Mayfield – in today’s interview, you look like an old fashioned Oklahoma cow paddy. Hope you got the grit to do in The Dawgs.

  1. ROLL TIDE!

Monday, December 04, 2017 – The Game of Bowls and The Coaching Game of Thrones

Monday, December 04, 2017 – The Game of Bowls and The Coaching Game of Thrones

I see this morning that the ESPN site has a guide to the upcoming college bowl games. Here’s what I’m thinking – Here is my guide to the upcoming college football bowl games.

From ESPN “For the first time since 2014 there were more bowl-eligible football teams than spots to compete this year.”

Me: That is because the bowl standards are too low; there are too many unqualified teams, there are too many bowl games, but it makes money for all involved.

You may divide your bowl games as you wish. I have divided my bowl games into the following categories:

  • The No Count Bowls,
  • The Never Heard of Before Bowls,
  • The No One Cares unless you or your child and money go there Bowls,
  • The Advertising and T-shirt Sales Bowls,
  • The SEC Bowl,
  • The Last Aggie Bowl Game before the Jimbo Era and of course
  • The Big Playoff Bowls.

This listing is incomplete, but I will update as we approach the days.

Noon on ABC on Dec. 16 – The Celebration Bowl – North Carolina A&T vs Grambling. I hope they show halftime and the Grambling Band. That is always something to celebrate.

1:00 on ESPN – The R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl with Troy and North Texas. What is this? R+L = X? The Algebra Bowl? Still it is in NOLA, so who cares?

The AutoNation Cure Bowl – Western Kentucky vs Georgia State at 2:30 CBSSN. From Orlando. Oh my, the Cure of the Nation is left up to these two teams and these states?

The Las Vegas Bowl – No. 25 Boise State vs. Oregon 3:30 on ABC. Thank goodness it is not on that seizure causing Boise State blue football field. I would bet $50 those Oregon yellow highlighters against the field would make me throw up.

The GILDAN New Mexico Bowl –Marshall versus Colorado State 4:30 ESPN. Never heard GILDON?

Raycom Media Camellia Bowl – Middle Tennessee vs Arkansas State ESPN. Might be fun.

The Goodyear Cotton Bowl has No. 8 USC vs No. 5 THE Ohio State. I call this one The Consolation Bowl Game or The Get Over It Ohio State and play better schedules Bowl.

The Play Station Fiesta Bowl has No. 11 Washington vs No. 9 Penn State on Dec 30 at 4:00 on ESPN. Why don’t you just do this one on a Play Station and we can all play? We can call it The Play Station Fan Interactive Bowl.

The Chick-fil-A-Peach Bowl with No. 12 UCF vs No. 7 Auburn. My cat, Peach, insists on watching this one, but she knows better than to purr for Auburn.

The Capitol One Orange Bowl – No.10 Miami vs No. 6 Wisconsin. What’s in Your Wallet? On Wisconsin!

TaxSlayer Bowl: Louisville 23 vs Mississippi State on Dec 30 on ESPN at noon. These two teams and states are now in charge of the new tax bill?

The AutoZone Liberty Bowl has Iowa State vs 20 Memphis Dec 30 at 12:30 on ABC. Yuk.

The Outback Bowl has Michigan vs South Carolina. I would rather go eat at Outback than watch.

The Citrus Bowl finds No. 17 LSU vs No. 14 Notre Dame on New Year’s Day on ABC. One of my most favs and one of my least favs. Bless me Father for I have sinned, but LSU is going to win.

The Camping World Bowl has No. 22 Virginia Tech vs No. 19 Oklahoma State. Does one have to camp out? If the Mountaineers win, will they burn the couches at their campsites?

The Valero Alamo Bowl in beautiful San Antonio has Stanford vs TCU at 9:00 ESPN. A fun city to have a bowl game regardless of who plays. This should be called The Tree Frog Bowl. Think about it!

The San Diego County Credit Union Holiday Bowl has No. 18 Washington State vs Michigan State. Go Leach!

The Walk-On’s Independence Bowl on Dec 27 has Florida State vs Southern Mississippi. The WALK ON BOWL? Can I play?

The Arizona Bowl New Mexico State Utah State on Dec 29. Oh boy! The Utes!

The Texas Bowl – THE University of Texas and Missouri. Really? You know the Aggies (and most any other team) would have brought a bigger crowd to Houston!

Again from ESPN: On Dec 29 “the former FSU Coach, Jimbo Fisher, will lead his new team, Texas A&M against Wake Forest in the Belk bowl.”

  1. What the Hell is the Belk Bowl?
  2. WAKE FOREST?
  3. Jimbo’s coaching???
  4. He does look good in a maroon blazer!
  5. Why did he come to the SEC? Watch out, Saban. The Aggies are coming and We Are Fearless!

Will those be the years of Championships????

I know I have left out some teams and bowl games, but the ESPN app crashed so I’m done for today except for the big Bowls.

5:00 on ESPN – The Rose Bowl – No. 3 Georgia and No.2 Oklahoma. I love a parade. Going to The Rose Bowl Parade is on my bucket list. As much as it pains me: Boomer Sooners!

8:45 on ESPN – The Sugar Bowl – No.4 Alabama v # 1 Clemson. These two and their fans in Nawlins!!! How fun is this? ROLL TIDE.

Monday, November 27, 2017 – Who’s In the National Playoff Foursome?

Monday, November 27, 2017 – Who’s In the National Playoff Foursome?

Since I only write about teams I like and teams that play teams I like, there are very few awards this Monday. This is due to the fact that almost all my teams lost in a most distressing and upsetting fashion.

Granted LSU is one of my teams, except when they play the Aggies. So Geaux Tigers.

In addition to Who’s In, the better question is Who’s Out? The Coaching Carousel Merry Go Round Award goes to Arkansas, Texas A&M, Arizona State, Mississippi State and others to follow. Florida, Ole Miss and UCLA hired new guys. Then Tennessee hired somebody, but then took it back. Is Jimbo Fisher really interested in Texas A&M? Maybe the entire coaching staffs from Austin Westlake or Lake Travis High School would be worth a look.

The Crappola Bowl Awards go to all of my teams who will be playing in bowl games with strange sponsors for a dinky trophy. This will give T-shirt manufactures job security.

The Iron Bowl Deficiency Award goes to the fans of Alabama.

The William T. Sherman Award goes to Auburn in hopes that the War Eagles will march through Georgia like Sherman to the Sea! But, I really do not care about either team. YUK.

The Best Hope for Texas Football Award goes to TCU. Please let TCU win the Big 12 Championship. Otherwise, the best college football teams in Texas are The University of North Texas and Sam Houston State University.

Thank goodness it is basketball season. How soon until March?