Tag Archives: Lee Corso

Friday, October 14, 2016 – Snarky Friday. Remember the Alamo!

Friday, October 14, 2016 – Snarky Friday. Remember the Alamo!

Lawdy Mercy, Honey Chile, I am a fretting like Aunt Pity Pat when the Yankees were coming. Alabama or Tennessee? There would not have been a Texas if there had not been a Tennessee. True and to the misinformed person holding a Game Day sign last weekend – The Vols did NOT cost Texas the Alamo. They were not even Volunteers until the Civil War. Learn your history. But one never hears “There would not have been a Texas if there had not been an Alabama.” There were many more defenders of The Alamo from Tennessee than Alabama. There were way more Mexicans too, but I digress.

If Tennessee upsets the #1 Crimson Tide, it means the #6 Texas Aggies travel to Tuscaloosa the following weekend to meet a really pissed off Alabama. If the Tide rolls over the Volunteers, it means the Texas Aggies travel to Tuscaloosa for a meeting of undefeated teams which could decide the SEC West and even the National Championship. Where are my salts? AKA – Tito’s.

Alabama and Tennessee at 2:30 on CBS – YUK – That probably means V. Lunquist and Gary Johnson will call the game. Mr. Johnson, I am confident that no one cares what plays you would have called. You are in the broadcast booth and not on the field.

That evening on ABC at 6:00 PM CT in a Showdown of the Big Ten we find #8 Wisconsin badgering to stop #2 The Ohio State University Buckeyes.

In between these two deciding games, we have Baylor hosting Kansas on FS1 at 2:30 and OU hosting Kansas State on ESPN at 11:00 AM. On The Longhorn Network, we have THE University of Texas hosting the ever popular Iowa State Cyclones at 6:00 PM. Remember when the Big 12 Teams used to be exciting?

Alabama or Tennessee? I am going with…

Born on a mountain top in Tennessee… I think that mountain top is called Rocky Top.

“The rest of you may go to Hell. I’m going to Texas!” Davy! Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier!

Texas Flag @ Sunset (800x600)

Tide, You better hope you can rise and Roll over Rocky Top because The Fighting Texas Aggies and The Twelfth Man are waiting on the other side.

So as Davy Crockett said to William B. Travis at The Alamo – “You gonna need a lot more men.”

barn-n-park-9-22-16-2016-09-22-041-800x530

Where is my coon skin cap? Oh yes, I loaned it to Lee Curses for Game Day. I hope he returns it next week in Tuscaloosa.

BTHO Alabama!

Monday, September 26, 2016 – The Monday After Saturday College Football Awards. Or Ring of Fire.

Monday, September 26, 2016 – The Monday After Saturday College Football Awards. Or Ring of Fire.

“I fell into a burning ring of fire; it went down, down, down and the flames went higher…

You can Cash in on that as the firings of college football coaches begin. It’s a long way to the Championship and the road will be littered with others.

And now, appropriately enough, our awards…

The U-Haul Your Butt Away trophy is awarded to LSU Coach, Les Miles with runners up trailers for coordinators at Notre Dame and LSU.

The Second Coming of Sherman Award goes to Georgia as the Ole Miss Rebels sang a chorus “… while we were marching in through Georgia.” Hotty Toddy! Rebels 45. Dawgs 14.

The Delay of Game for Lightening AGAIN Award goes to Oklahoma State University. I am pretty sure those chrome looking helmets worn by both teams was the cause of the lightening striking nearby.

bu-osu-rain-delay-800x447

The Wizard of Oz Award goes to Baylor – The last hope of The Big 12 Schools to have a chance to win something other than a goofy, no count, never heard of before bowl game. Baylor – 35 Oklahoma State – 24.

rainbow-over-baylor-450x800

McLane Stadium Waco 2016 Photo by Larry

The John Wayne Christmas Tree Award goes to Notre Dame for being upset by Duke. Blue Devils 38. Catholics 35. That is no Bull Durham.

John Wayne (600x800)

The Why Are You Even Here Award? goes to Delaware State for staying until the bitter end of a 79-0 loss to Missouri.

The Running Up of the Numbers Award goes to The University of Houston for a blow out of Texas State of 64-3.

The U of H Board of Regents win The Fastest Quorum Award for an emergency meeting voting to up Herman’s salary to keep him and the Herman’s Hermits on Buffalo Bayou and not a bayou on the Mississippi.

The E-Reptile Dysfunction Award goes to Florida as the Gators were not able to cross Rocky Top for a 12th time.

He had the nerve and he had the blood and there never was a horse like the Tennessee stud…

However, let us not forget it is the SEC East where the practice teams play in preparation to the real teams in the SEC West. Tennessee – 38 Florida – 26.

The Tigers of LSU win the following Awards:

The Highest Decibel Level for a single state screaming Curse Words in a Single Second.

The Most Beer Cans Thrown at TVs in bars in a Single Second.

The Best Country Western song: There Goes My Sphinctor and my Job in One Single Second.

The Jimmy Buffet Fins Award – The Land Sharks are circling and you’re the only bait in town.

Auburn wins The Charmin Award for wrapping the sacred trees to celebrate its weird victory over LSU. The award also comes with free tickets to the Fireman’s Ball. Bond for the idiot who set the toilet paper on fire and thus the sacred trees is not included in the package.

Alabama wins The Hormonal Award for its whipping of the Kent State Golden Flashes. Alabama – 48 and Kent State – 0. Obviously the Flashes were not hot enough to put any points on the score board.

The Thank You for No Over-Time Award goes to Texas A&M Aggies. How do you like the defense now? Arkansas – 24 Texas A&M – 45.

The Timex Award goes to the Arkansas quarterback, Austin Allen. He took a lickin, but kept on tickin. What a gutty performance. True Southern Grit.

The Curse of the Media Award goes to Texas A&M and AP Top 25 Poll for saying it.

If any team is going to challenge the Crimson Tide in the SEC West,

it’s the Aggies.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/colleges/ap-top-25-heat-check-fallout-and-falling-out-at-lsu/2016/09/26/59dc5620-83bf-11e6-b57d-dd49277af02f_story.html

Say it ain’t so. Every year when some sports broadcaster or writers says something like this, the Aggies begin to slide as if they stepped in owl manure. How about just having Lee Curses (Lee Corso) and Herbie Pie Cutie Pie (Kirk Herbstreit) continue to pick against the Aggies on Game Day?