Monthly Archives: October 2017

Monday, October 09, 2017 – Monday After College Football Awards

Posted on October 9, 2017 | Leave a comment

Monday, October 09, 2017 – Monday After College Football Awards

Happy Indigenous People Day! You want to take down some statues? How about the New World explorers? Moving on.

What a weekend of college football whoppers! The first Poopy Undies goes to The Crimson Tide from Alabama. This may be the only pair of Poopy Undies you get until the SEC championship, but for now this one is yours from Aggieland. As always, the Aggies never lose; time just runs out. And time ran out as the Tide was going out after its stiffest test yet. Alabama 27 Aggies 19.

Joining Alabama and receiving a Poopy Undies Award are THE University of Texas and The University of Oklahoma. Bevo’s Boys held on for a second OT with win over Kansas State 40 – 34.

Obviously the Cyclone warnings did not go off in Norman as Iowa State stunned the Sooners with a 38-31 victory. Bevo won’t be big enough, old enough or strong enough next weekend to hold off a very mad OU team.

The Great Game of Mediocrity Award goes to Florida 16 and LSU 17. Keep it up, Gators. The Aggies are coming and we now used to high Tides and swampy waters in Texas.

The Award for the Best Game that Nobody Saw goes to Western Michigan University and Buffalo, with seven overtimes, 139 points and a Buffalo loss 71-68.

But the He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother Award goes to Western Michigan’s Donnie Ernsberger’s sister for running on the field thinking the game was over at the end of the second OT.

https://www.cbssports.com/college-football/news/seven-ots-139-points-wmu-edges-buffalo-in-highest-scoring-longest-fbs-game/

The Best End Zone Award goes to the great Gene Stallings and his 1967 SWC Champions and Cotton Bowl Victors over Bear Bryant’s Alabama. In spite of suffering a heart attack last weekend, he was there with his team. Them Junction Boys are tough. Thank you, Coach Stallings, for all you’ve to done to make the Aggies, the Bear and Alabama very proud.

Photo by Terry

The Best Photos of the Flyover Taken in the Front Yard goes to me. One has about five seconds before they are out of sight.

Friday, October 6, 2017 – Stage Left: The Snark Appears

Posted on October 6, 2017 | Leave a comment

Friday, October 6, 2017 – Stage Left: The Snark Appears

Before we get to our college football Snarky Friday, let us offer congratulations to the Houston Astros for their 8-2 victory yesterday over the Boston Red Sox in Game one of the American League Division Playoffs. I would have so enjoyed seeing second baseman, Jose Altuve, become the 9th player with a 3 HR game in postseason history. But the game was not televised on TV on a reasonable channel – even for someone with has many sports channels as I have.

Therefore today, when I turn on my TV at 1:00, I better see some players in Astro uniforms getting ready to play some players in Boston Red Sox uniforms. Do not make me go 8th Grade School Teacher on you. GO ASTROS!

What is on the screens tomorrow for college football? Starting the morning at 11:00 AM we have potential Blow Outs featuring:

Ole Miss and Auburn on SECN
Georgia and Vanderbilt on ESPN
Iowa State and Oklahoma on FOX
Texas Tech and Kansas on FS1
Wake Forest and Clemson on ESPN2.

I do not like any of those schools at this time.

At 2:30 it is time to catch the shuttle to campus to tailgate. I should arrive mid to end of first quarter for these interesting games.

West Virginia and TCU on FS 1 – ESPN Game Day comes to you from Fort Worth, Texas. Lee Curser will look good in the Big Horned Frog head.
LSU and Florida on CBS – Remember Troy! For Tigers’ sake, it was homecoming last weekend! Swamp. Swamp. Chomp. Chomp.

Scheduling right along;

4:10 Spirit Walk @ War Hymn Statue
4:20 Kyle Field Gates Open
5:00 Corps Step off @ Quad
5:30 – Take shuttle back home to watch:

From the Big 12 Conference which is really only 10 teams, at 6:00 on FS1 from Royal Texas Memorial Stadium. Royal Texas Memorial Stadium??? Huh? That ain’t right! That is how the ESPN app shows it, Horns.

Allow me to continue correctly. Coming to you on FS1 from Daryl K. Royal Memorial Stadium, THE University of Texas hosts the Kansas State Wildcats. To save us all time and data charges tomorrow for texting the following question: “How old is Bill Snyder?” Tomorrow is his birthday. He will be 77 years old.

May I offer this small suggestion to the Longhorn team? Do not see past the purple haze tomorrow in anticipation of seeing red next weekend.

And now a football trifecta. All three of my alma maters play tomorrow. I got papers from all three hanging on the wall.

In the Battle of the Big Thicket, also at 6:00 the Stephen F. Austin Lumberjacks play the Sam Houston State Bearkats. Ax ‘Em, Jacks! This will be on the small tablet screen streaming ESPN3.

Scheduling along:

5:56 Spirit of Aggieland
6:08 National Anthem: Texas Our Texas
6:15 –on ESPN – Kick-Off – BTHO ALABAMA!
6:16 – Ensure Smelling Salts are close by. Get Dammit Doll Ready.

First, to the Announcers:

Corp march in 2016. Photo by me.

Dear ESPN, if one of your booth mouth jockeys or whichever of you is on the ground – If you say “Battle Hymn” instead of War Hymn as you did last week, please run. Run Away Now. Run to Austin. Remember those people pictured above carry swords.

Second: Welcome to College Station, Texas, Coach Sabin (sic). I hope you like the hospitality and have a memorial experience in Kyle Field.

Looking out my backyard. Photo by me.

Third: Pardon me for yelling, but it is going to take a lot more yelling than this. OH LORD! LET THERE BE A MIRACLE ON THE BRAZOS ON SATURDAY NIGHT IN KYLE FIELD BY THE LIGHT OF THE SILVERY MOON.

PLEASE DO NOT LET THE TIDE RUNNETH OVER AND DROWN DOTH THE AGGIES.

Photo by KB

PLEASE LET THE 12TH MAN SOUNDETH LOUD WHEN ALABAMA HAS THE BALL.

PLEASE HOPE I HAVE ENOUGH SMELLING SALTS UNTIL THE CLOCK READS 00:00 ENDING THE GAME.

PLEASE, HELP THE AGGIES BEATETH THE HELL OUT OF ALABAMA!

Thursday, October 5, 2017 – Take Me Out to the Ballgame

Posted on October 5, 2017 | 1 comment

Thursday, October 5, 2017 – Take Me Out to the Ballgame

I memorized and recited this great American poem when I was in Grade Eight. It still one of my favorites.

Here’s what I’m thinking. I am getting my father’s Houston Astros cap out of the closet, making me a hot dog with mustard and pickle relish, having a cold beer, and thinking that my father, Honeyboy, is doing the same in Heaven. Backstory: HB preplanned his funeral years before he passed away. When the funeral director asked what type of casket he preferred, he asked with a straight and serious face “Do you have something with a television with good reception so I can see my Astros?” When he passed away in February 2000 the minister noted Minute Maid Park had a retractable roof so he need not worry about being able to see the games from above. The first game played in the new stadium was the following month between the Houston Astros and the New York Yankees.

Then I think he and I are listening to Casey at the Bat and hoping all of those players mentioned play for the Boston Red Sox. LET’S GO ASTROS!

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Posted in Native Texan

Tagged baseball, Casey at the Bat, Houston Astros

Wednesday, October 04, 2017 – Golf or Something Like It

Posted on October 5, 2017 | 1 comment

Wednesday, October 04, 2017 – Golf or Something Like It

My apologies for the late post today. I actually dragged myself out of bed this morning and on to the golf course for the Briarcrest CC Ladies monthly golf scramble. I was confident my inner Asian golfer’s evil twin, Yu So Suk would show. For the most part she did.

We were in teams of three. There was me, playing like Yu So Suk, Susi, playing as Not Dat Way, and last year’s club Champion, Olivia.

But twice my inner the good twin Asian golfer, Yu So Yung, appeared, both times to save par. And twice Susie’s inner golfer, Yu So Grate, appeared to sink two birdies in a row.

Olivia did the rest while Susi and I reflected on Mark Twain and a good walk spoiled.

Of course the best hole in golf is the 19th – especially when your team wins with a bogy free 4 under! Our shared winning totaled $60.00 – twenty bucks for each of us.

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Posted in humor, Native Texan

Tuesday, October 3, 2017 – Wardrobes for the Weekend – Lace Bralette

Posted on October 3, 2017 | 1 comment

Tuesday, October 3, 2017 – Wardrobes for the Weekend – Lace Bralette

It is ever too early to start preparing for this weekend’s football game. I am so excited. Ms. Navasota and I have an opportunity to tailgate in the afternoon prior to the Texas Aggie Alabama game Saturday night. Maybe Ms. Navasota’s cousin KT will join us.

I dusted off the Beat Alabama Shrine last evening and begin lighting the candle when I say vespers. I realize the helmet, even with the JM autograph is of little value, but he is the only one to have Rolled back the Tide.

Ms. Navasota, Cousin KT and I want to blend in with the college coed crowd so we need an appropriate game day wardrobe. Just because it has been almost 50 years since we graduated from under grad school, we want to fit it toe to head.

I believe we three are able to produce the necessary cowboy boots. I mean we are all Native Texas so we have several pair.

We have had difficulty to finding Daisy Dukes cut offs in our sizes that show off our butt cheeks. It seems the stores do not carry our sizes of cut offs with elastic waists or in super stretch. I believe we have been able to make do with some jeans we had left over from George W.’s first term and a pair of pinkin shears. Those alligator teeth scissors.

I am going to skip bodice attire and focus on face and head-gear and save the bodice until last. Like boots, all Native Texas have a cowboy hat of some sort. Real cowboys and cowgirls have several hats – the high dollar beaver hat you wear to rodeo; the nice summer straw hat you wear in the summer; the hats you work it and the $2.00 hat you wear to costume parties.

This cheap cowboy hat is appropriate else it distract from the $250 Rayban Aviator sun glasses that adorn your face. Side bar: Being the more literary type, my $250 Rayban sun glasses are called “Gatsby” for the sign over the Optical Shop in The Great Gatsby and Cats That Support Aggies.

But back to bodice. I have purchased each of us a maroon lace bralette.

While it sounds like a cheap wine or a French dessert, it seems you wear this over your bra and it is supposed to function as a shirt or blouse. I honest to God do not know if this is the back or the front. We will have to experiment.

We will supply our own bras to wear under our lace bralettes. I suppose the bras I have with NIKE on them will not work. Oooh, I wonder if there is a bra that says BTHO Bama! I would so wear that.

I doubt you will be able to see us on television because we will be so blended in with the co-eds. I plan to wear my maroon bralette over my T-shirt.