Wednesday, October 21, 2015 – Healthy Elderly Needed for Study


Wednesday, October 21, 2015 – Healthy Elderly Needed for Study

Want to be a guinea pig and make some money? This sounds like something my sister would like to do – except for the last part. The Texas A&M Education and Human Development College is conducting a study where you get paid to stay in bed for 10 days.

The study examines the effects of a pill on the preservation of muscle mass during bed rest and recovery after bed rest.

Time commitment consists of two or three screening visits, five study days prior to 10 days and nights of bed rest. Here’s the catch. It is followed by an eight week exercise program to measure your muscle mass. And I think you stay here during the 10 days and nights of bed rest.

Patricia Motel (800x534)

The Patricia Motel – Ferriday, Louisiana

But if you are selected it pays $125 for screening, up to $400 for study visits prior to bed rest and up to $125 per day for each day of bed rest and then $100 per week during the exercise program.

Yes, one could make a nice income supplement. But do ever wonder how these studies determine the side effects listed on the labels? You could be in the side effects group and not know it.

Side effects may include bloating, gas, hives, toe nail fungus, vomiting, diarrhea, twitching, itching, singing the blues, hallucinations, personality changes causing Republicans to vote for Hillary and select a Speaker of the House of Representatives. Additional side effects include holding a Donald Trump tailgate party in your front yard, driving while naked and yelling “Ted Cruz for President.”

If you are interested in being a part of a research experiment and making a little side money, for more information check out today’s Bryan Eagle, call 979.422.1789  or email research@ctral.org.

Oh – I forgot to post this photo from Saturday’s tailgate party. It is downloadable, suitable for copying and distribution so you will not have to hang your bed sheets on the front porch or from your car port when Alabama visits the rest of the SEC.

Sabin sign (600x800)

 

 

3 responses to “Wednesday, October 21, 2015 – Healthy Elderly Needed for Study

  1. principaljudy@gmail.com

    Hysterical!!!

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Like

  2. I was ready to sign up…..right up my alley. Ten days in the bed!!!! Then read the exercise part. Don’t think so. I’ve lived for almost 79 years without doing a whole lot of exercise. Think I shall continue like I am doing. And I know I don’t look as well as my sister but…..it is what it is..

    Oh the Patricia Motel in Ferriday Louisiana…..I think they have “hourly rates”….not 10 days.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Perhaps you could stay at the Holiday Inn in Port Allen or the place in Shreveport if you don’t mind the prostitutes and the people passed out on the floor, respectively. These are excellent family stories – get any one of us to tell their version of it.

    Like

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