FAQ for RFN
OK – as of this date – All Saint’s Day – November 1 – there are only a few names submitted for the As Yet Unnamed Home School of One. I am aware that many of you have been gallivanting around the globe and seeing the spacious skies and purple mounted majesties. Some of you have been wasting away in Margaritville in Pacific coastal beach resorts. And at least one of you is finding your inner peace in Peru. But many of you have returned and there is still plenty of time to submit a name for As Yet Unnamed Home School of One. So I know on the deadline day – Daylights Savings Time Ends – there will be a flurry of names submitted for review. Right? Now get busy.
As in the real process a Frequently Asked Questions document is available at the half way point.
1. Q. Do I have to follow these instructions?
A. Obviously not, since only a few names have been submitted.
2. Q. Can I suggest a name to you on the golf course?
A. Yes, write it on the score card.
3. Q. Can I submit my name to you at a bar?
A. Yes, but write it on the coaster. Not the cocktail napkin. It is sturdier and has a better liklihood of getting to my house.
4. Q. Can I submit my suggestions via my work computer?
A. Probably not your best move unless you plan to leave soon or your suggestion is the Big Brother Academy of Misinformation.
5. Q. Can I submit my suggestions via text message?
A. Yes, but not during the World Series or NCAA football games. I am too busy texting my friends and family.
6. Q. Will a list of names that are submitted on golf score cards, bar coasters and personal emails and texts be made available to the public?
A. Check later in the week for submitted names. Perhaps one of them will spark your brain to submit something equally as clever.
7. Q. What happens if there are not enough names submitted to name the school?
A. In the event, you the home school constituency does not submit a sufficient number of names to review OR if the Review Committee Refuses to Review, the following alternative selection process will be implemented.
A super size 4’ X 6’ grid similar to a standard BINGO card will be designed. This is the same size as the indoor/outdoor rug in my dwelling. In the squares submitted names will be placed.
The AYUHSOO Board President, Buddy T. Cat will make the selection. Mr. Cat will vomit on the grid. The square with the hairball will become the name of the school.
HEY! What’s wrong with that process? It’s the same one King Hairspray uses without the vomit part. He just picks his friends and contributors with no process.