Monday, October 25, 2021 – My Monday After Saturday College Football Awards

Another week of college football is in the books. And there were some doozies!

Will the following teams’ representatives please go the West Exit door to receive your Poopy Undies Certificates? There are so many teams that receive this former Trophy that I have had to go to brown paper certificates.

Let’s give the Midshipman of Navy the Almost Upset Award while Cincinnati receives a Rally Award for having to come from behind. Navy 20 Cincinnati 27.

Let give The Exhaustion Award to Penn State and Illinois. It took NINE, yes 9 Overtimes for Henry Blake’s alma mater to beat Penn State 20 to 18.

To the Oklahoma Sooners I award The Bullwinkle Award in honor of Bullwinkle’s alma mater – WhatsAMatter U? What was the matter? It was KANSAS! Nevertheless, Rock Chalk Jayhawk wins an Almost Upset Award too. 35 to 23

Wake Forest and Army both take home the No Defense Detected Award. Wake Forest 70 and Army 56.

Ole Miss 31 LSU 17. Poor Tigers! Better Call PETA Award. Also, note that the border between Louisiana and Texas is closed for all head coaching recruits.

Mississippi State beat Vanderbilt 45 to 6. I’m giving Vanderbilt the Courage for Even Showing Up Award. Vanderbilt football always reminds me of that commercial where the little kid in the green shirt gets to run for a touchdown.

Texas A&M 44 and South Carolina 14. – The Ags receive SCORE and SCORE MORE AWARD! I think the fourth depth chart players were playing the fourth quarter. The Aggies also receive the Early Bird Bye Award.

THE UNIVERSITY of Texas in Austin won their Bye Week. I think the Horns should count it as a win – especially this season. Only two more games and you will be bowl eligible. Maybe you will get that bowl game in Frisco, Texas. It is the Tropical Smoothie Café Bowl. Maybe the Cheez It Bowl?

Alabama 52 and Tennessee 24 – Rocky Top swamped again. I award The One Award to Alabama. There is ONE team that beat you.

The Best Award for a Beer Pong Halftime Performance goes to the Michigan Band who trolled their next opponent Ohio State. Love the bounces.