Monday, October 19, 2020 – My Monday After College Football Awards
Let’s kickoff the awards show with Tennessee. I give the Volunteers the Beach Shoe Award for Kentucky being a Flip and Tennessee being a Flop. Glad that I am not on Rocky Flop. Kentucky 34 – Tennessee 7
A Poopy Undies Award goes to the Auburn and South Carolina Fans – even the cardboard ones. South Carolina Gamecocks receive The Historical Award for their first victory over Auburn since 1933 (Yes, 1933, Herbert Hoover was the President.)
Auburn receives The Controversy Award once again this week for ending the game in a controversial, under review regarding intentional grounding and an complete or incomplete pass. Here, Auburn, take the Look at the Rule Book Trophy too. Auburn 22 and South Carolina 30.
One other award for South Carolina – It is the Shut That Damn Screeching Bird Up! It sounds as though alley cats are in heat.
To the Arkansas Razorbacks I give the Etta James Award for At Last, a victory. It’s time to put those red, plastic pig snout hats on and call the Hogs. Hogs 33 – Ole Miss 21. Get your Halloween on, Hogs and the Aggies will see you in Kyle Field.
Texas A&M and Mississippi State. Both teams receive a PETA Award for the animal rights activist being escorted off the field by the Mississippi State Police before kickoff. I am not certain if the protest was against Reveille or Bully.
I would like to present Emmanuel Forbes of Mississippi State with The Big Solid Award for intercepting Kellen Mond on a freak deflection interception and returning it for a touchdown. Google the play if you did not see it. The ball went 15 yards forward, bounced off of a player and went 15 yards backwards.
To the Texas A&M Aggies, I give the Box of Raisins Award. Just because you are 3-1 with no ranked teams left to play, do not get above your raisin and get overconfident.
To Mike Leach: OK -The score was Texas A&M 28 and 14. One defensive squirrely score and one offensive score late in the game. I told you it would come down to the faster, better hands and fewer penalties. Even the mouths at the half-time shows are wondering if the one play of Everybody Run and Somebody Try to Catch the Ball offensive will work in the SEC. I give Mike the Jack Sparrow Award and present him with a link to the wishbone offense.
Speaking of Mouths, once again Gary Danielson of CBS receives the PLEASE Do Not Speak Award! Let’s all contact CBS with criticism. When the Big Names in college football talk about His Awfulness, and his biased calls of games, I know it is not just me. Just Mute Gary!
To Georgia I give an award for It was Fun While It Lasted. Alabama receives the Rebound Award for returning after the half with a vengeance. Alabama/Georgia 41-24.
While there were many candidates for the Exploding Head Coach, with Jimbo and Muschamp always contenders, the award goes to Nick Saban. Glad you are OK Coach.
Wear your mask. Vote.